


My Odds: The 77th Annual Hunger Games

by Lunarelle



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, The Hunger Games (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen, Hunger Games, Hunger Games Tributes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-01
Updated: 2017-08-01
Packaged: 2018-12-09 18:15:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 29,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11674473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunarelle/pseuds/Lunarelle
Summary: The Rebellion has failed and District Thirteen is no more. Most of the past victors have died, although some remain. The Hunger Games continue, with a new president, who's ruthless. A new arena, new Tributes. AU, being as it doesn't follow the canon storyline.





	1. Chapter 1

I didn't really win anything, you know. Nobody ever did.

I won the right to keep living, and I guess that's a huge thing. And I won a year's supply of food and various goods for the people in my district.

But nobody who makes it through the Hunger Games is a winner. No. We are simply survivors.

* * *

"Nova Raway."

My name sounded foreign to my ears. I didn't move, even though kids all around me were turning to look at me, and the Peacekeepers, having located me, moved to grab me by force if necessary.

Taking a deep breath, I began to walk, hearing a sharp scream to my right – my mother. I tried to block her out. I was scared enough as it was without having to worry about her now. I knew the fear registered on my face, but there was nothing I could do about it.

My new booties made a musical sound on the ground as I walked towards the podium. I was wearing a cute little dress printed with black daisies, and it occurred to me that it was rather appropriate for a shroud. After all, I was going to die.

I was from District Six. Transportation was our thing. We built hovercrafts, the trains, cars, everything that had to do with transporting people. My father had designed the latest Tribute trains, which meant that I had never had to sign up for tesserae in my life. I was supposed to be safe.

But I obviously hadn't been.

I reached the podium in time to hear my mother screaming my name. As I climbed the stairs, I saw her trying to reach me, fighting my father tooth and nail in order to escape the strong circle of his arms. I knew he'd take care of her once I died.

"Don't be so shy, child!" cried our representative, Hera, as she took my hand and pulled me to her. "How old are you?" she asked.

"Sixteen."

"Well, you're very pretty, aren't you? Are you excited?"

Was I excited to die? I couldn't even form an answer and just looked at her, my brown eyes wide. As to her comment about prettiness, that remained to be seen.

Although I was sixteen, I still had what I considered to be a baby face. I looked younger because of the spray of freckles on my nose and cheeks, which was heavier on the right side than the left. I had full lips and large limpid eyes, but I didn't wear makeup to enhance my features because my mother was against it.

Hera quickly moved to the large glass ball that held the fluttering slips of papers with the boys' names on them. "Our next tribute… Alex Morley!"

I scanned the crowd, but it was unnecessary. He was already walking over to the podium. If he was scared, he didn't show it much. Only his eyes betrayed him as they cut left and right, seemingly looking for an escape.

Alex belonged to one of the poorer sectors of our district, I saw that immediately by the clothes he wore. He had a large scar running from beneath his lower lip to the jaw, almost touching his right ear.

"Well, here you are! The tributes from District Six!" Hera beamed and applauded enthusiastically, and several people joined her half-heartedly. Our district had been deeply affected by the failed rebellion. Several of our most prominent people had been killed, and our businesses had been shut down for months.

Only my father, having shown proof that he hadn't rebelled at all, thanks to his connection to the Peacekeepers, had been able to continue working, along with others who had similar connections to the Capitol. But it had been horrible. I'd freely given food away in school to the kids who had none.

None of it mattered now.

We were ushered into the Justice Building, which was still being repaired after the bombing we had sustained. The moment I was left alone in a room, the door opened and both my parents came in.

My mother was hysterical, unable to speak to me, only able to hold me. My father's face was pale and drawn, making me want to scream at him.

_What good are your allegiances to the Peacekeepers now Daddy? Despite everything you did to help them, I'm going to the Hunger Games to die!_

I said nothing of the sort, of course, merely telling both of them that I loved them. "Let me go, Mom. I'm already dead."

They left me, looking stunned, thus allowing my few friends to come in to say goodbye. My best friend Calla and her brother David both hugged me with tears in their eyes.

"This is completely unfair," said David in a low voice. "Why you, of all people?"

"Because someone's got to go. You saw what happened when they tried to cancel the Games, it was a nightmare."

David shrugged, "Doesn't make it right."

The two of them were followed by a few of my classmates – kids I'd known my whole life, most of whom I was on very good terms with. It was a tense moment as I did everything I could to keep myself composed.

When the Peacekeepers came to get me, they looked at me with an expression of sorrow in their eyes. I hoped they would help my parents get through my death as well as possible.

I was still too stunned to look at the cameras at the train station. I just boarded as quickly as possible, then sat down in the first chair I saw, which happened to be in a large and luxurious compartment, decorated in grey and silver tones. I vaguely recognized some of the patterns as my father's design, which made me want to cry.

Alex came in after me, and glanced down at me with distaste. My father's dealings with the Peacekeepers were well-known.

"Is  _daddy_  going to go to the Peacekeepers to try and stop the Games?" he spat at me.

I didn't answer. What could I say? Alex probably hadn't had a decent meal in weeks, whereas I'd had a copious breakfast a couple of hours previously: three pancakes with apple compote and ice-cold milk.

Oh, but thinking of breakfast made my stomach churn. Before I knew it, bile had risen in my throat and my hand flew to my mouth. A Capitol attendant on the train rushed me to a small bathroom, where I was sick for several minutes. As I slid to the floor, I felt the train begin to move.

It was some time before I was able to stumble back to the compartment where I dropped onto a couch, shivering so much I felt like I was going to fall to the floor.

The same attendant came to me, covering me with a blanket and placing a glass of cold mint-flavored water on the table in front of me. In a strange gesture, he wiped the sweat from my brow, the way a father would have done.

Someone else placed a holograph machine next to the water, turning it on so that I could watch the rest of the reapings. I saw children of all ages being chosen and led to the stage. In one case, one girl was nearly dragged towards her representative, obviously wanting to go to the Games as much as I did.

"Hit you that you're gonna die, right?" asked Alex from behind me. His voice was seething. "You wanna go home?"

"Give it a rest," snapped Hera. "She's here, same as you, and you're both going to have to make the most of it."

We had no mentors. The only two remaining victors from our district had been killed in the failed rebellion the previous year, almost immediately after the 76th Hunger Games. It was therefore Hera's job to do something to help us in the arena.

"Can either of you do anything?"

"I'm the best rope-climber in my class," said Alex immediately.

I just shook my head. I had endurance, so I could run for a long time without getting tired, but I suspected that had a lot to do with my having had food all my life. I was fairly certain that I would die within a few days of being in the arena.

Although…

An idea came to me. My mother was a teacher who was fond of herbs, and she had her own little herb garden behind the kitchen. Ever since I'd been little, she'd taught me to recognize edible herbs and berries, even having me sketch them until I could identify them by sight, smell, taste, and touch.

"I know herbs and berries," I said in a low voice.

Alex snorted, "Herbs and berries… that'll keep you."

"That's useful knowledge," Hera told him. "Make sure you go to the edible plants station as soon as you can, all right?" She knelt in front of me. "You can't give up. Who knows? You could last a while in the arena."

"Or I could die on the first day," I whispered sitting up and picking up the glass of water. I sipped the liquid gingerly.

"Eat something. Enjoy this while you can, and rest. We'll be arriving at the Capitol during the night, and you'll be taken straight to your dormitories for a good night's sleep before going to the Remake Center."

I tried. I walked around the train, and even changed out of my dress, putting on black leggings and a black and red tunic that fell to the top of my thighs. I applied some eyeliner pencil to my eyes, which immediately changed my entire appearance.

"Oh! That's much better, Nova!" exclaimed Hera when I came out. "You see? You look like you could get sponsors already like that."

Maybe that was true, but my heart wasn't in it.

Lunch was served on plates that looked too pretty to be stained, and although my stomach wasn't ready to accept food, I ate a delicious broth with vegetables and bits of chicken and noodles in it. It was probably the best thing I'd ever tasted in my life.

"Oh my God," I whispered. "How do people  _make_  something like this?"

"Good, isn't it?" asked Hera.

"I thought you were one of those people who ate every day," said Alex, already devouring some roast beef with indecent voracity.

"Just because I don't take out tesserae doesn't mean I eat things as good as these. I've never had soup like this before."

"My name was in that ball thirty-four times today," he said moodily.

"And mine was in there five times. It only takes one slip of paper to send you to the arena." Panic threatened to overwhelm me, and for a moment, my hands shook so much that my spoon clattered against my bowl.

"You're really scared, aren't you?" asked Alex.

"Of course I'm scared, you idiot. Didn't you hear my mother screaming? She and my father thought I was going to be safe from the Reaping. Until three years ago, we could have used the tesserae, but we made do with what we had because my parents didn't want me to take any out."

I said nothing else and excused myself from the table, roaming the train for something to do. I found myself in a library compartment, and pulled out a small book on herbs. Bringing it over to where Hera and Alex were sitting, I studied it until we arrived at the Capitol, just before midnight.

Despite the late hour, there were hundreds of people crowding the large train station. I'd never seen anything like it away from the broadcasts and Capitol shows, and suddenly felt overwhelmed by everything. The people cheered us on as though they'd never seen anything as mesmerizing as we were. Some of them even ran behind the car as we made our way to the Remake Center, where we would be spending our first night.

It was unbelievable.


	2. Chapter 2

"Oh, look at all those freckles!" exclaimed Acestes, my stylist. "Well, we don't have time to remove them, I'm afraid, so we'll have to make do with what we have."

"Sorry to disappoint," I told him. I was cranky after the treatment my prep team had put me through, waxing away every single bit of hair on my body, and even plucking at my eyebrows. My fingers stung where they had buffed my nails, removing loose skin from my cuticles and making me look, as they put it, Capitol-ready.

"Nonsense, dear, you're not disappointing at all. At least you look pretty. The last tribute we had here had buck teeth!"

I remembered her. She had died when the rebels had blown up the arena in an effort to stop the 76th Hunger Games. There had been no victor the previous year: every single tribute had been killed, which was why these Games were more exciting for everyone watching.

"And to think that everyone was killed like that," said Eliana, a woman on my prep team. "It's barbaric."

Barbaric? Because the Hunger Games weren't barbaric on their own? I bit my lip hard to keep myself from saying anything, instead listening to the idle chatter going on around me. My prep team discussed past Games, the best styles they had seen so far, and how they wished they could have Districts One or Four.

_Gee, that makes me feel great._

I felt nervous. Because District Six was transportation, I knew that my stylist could have gone in several directions with my outfit. Sometimes, the tributes were dressed in sailing outfits or as old-fashioned train conductors. There had been a horrible year where the tributes had been dressed as railroad workers covered in soot, which had made it impossible for anybody to see their faces. I really hoped that I wasn't going to look like a clown.

"I don't want you to worry," said Acestes. "I've come up with a beautiful way to make you shine. Your district does hovercrafts as well, right?"

I nodded warily.

"Well then, this will be perfect!"

The prep team started on my makeup, and I noticed right away that everything was silvery-blue, from my nails to my lips. Once all that was done, he instructed me to put on the outfit he had made.

It was breathtaking, I had to give him that. I had seen a similar outfit on luxury specials in the Capitol, and this one was the most luxurious one I'd ever seen.

I was wearing pants made of a silver-blue material that shone every time I moved, with a tight matching top and wide silver weapon belt. A silvery-white sleeveless jacket and low boots completed the outfit, making me look like a hovercraft controller. The jacket even had the hovercraft logo on it.

"This is gorgeous!" I exclaimed, taking a look at myself in the mirror. "Thank you, Ace!"

I looked like a completely different person. My hair was sleek and shiny, twisted up into an elegant bun that was covered with a silvery hovercraft that managed to complement the outfit and not look ridiculous. My eyes seemed to be popping out thanks to the dramatic makeup, and my silver lips looked as though they were meant to be kissed.

Many people turned to stare at me when I entered the area where the chariots were. Alex was wearing a more masculine version of my outfit, which made him look much more intimidating than he usually did. His brown hair had been cut and now stuck out in all different directions thanks to what could only be a copious amount of gel.

"Don't you two look  _amazing_?" cried Hera as she saw us. "I might have found a potential sponsor, so let me go grab him, that way I'll be able to point the two of you out to him when you come out during the parade!"

I smiled a little as I got into the chariot. Would people notice me? Would it be enough to get me a sponsor or two? I looked around, seeing that the District One tributes looked amazing in outfits covered in emerald gems and that the girl from District Four had actual pearls gleaming in her dark hair.

As the parade started, I felt my heart racing in my chest. I heard several people screaming my name when I rode by with Alex, and he looked at me with surprise in his eyes. Maybe our stylists had come up with something better than we'd originally thought. Whatever it was, the effect was good enough to throw us into the spotlight for a few seconds of exposure.

I listened to President Snow, only thirteen, speaking in a high and cold voice about the way the Hunger Games had ended the previous year, and how her grandfather had been killed along with her parents, thus making her the youngest president in the nation. It was obvious that she relished the Hunger Games. Gone was the little girl who had admired the tributes. Now, it seemed like she hated us.

"Happy Hunger Games!" she said at last. "And may the odds be ever in your favor!"

I was happy to find myself in my room at the Training Center after that ordeal. Hera congratulated us and told us to wash up and get ready for dinner, which I was only too happy to do.

The shower was unlike anything I'd ever seen before, although I'd heard about Capitol accommodations. It seemed as though the shower thought for me, giving me lavender-scented soap and shampoo and regulating the water temperature just right.

The closet was something else entirely. All I had to do was push a button and I got twenty outfits of different styles and colors. I chose an olive green dress and black boots along with various bangles and long necklaces for that first evening.

"You know, I could really get used to living like this," I said, entering the large living area, which was decorated in beige and blue tones.

"Without having to think about anything?" asked Alex. He was feeling a little calmer, although he still regarded me with hostility.

"Not having to think about clothes? I'd love that. Just press a button and your outfit, complete with accessories, comes right before you. That would knock off twenty minutes from my morning, easy."

Alex shook his head, "Girls," he hissed. "You won't have to worry about that in a few days."

"That's true. But I might as well enjoy it now that I'm here."

"Exactly!" cried Hera. "You see? That's just how you should be thinking. Just let go of your worries. There's nothing you can do about the Games anyway. Just let them happen and have fun for now!"

We ate an excellent dinner comprised of a delicious salad, roasted pheasant and potatoes and a perfect chocolate ice cream. I had to force myself to stop there, not wanting to overindulge on anything, even though my stomach was telling me to gorge myself on everything I was seeing.

The following day brought the first day of training, and the first time we would get to see each other in normal clothes. We all wore the same thing: black pants and a white shirt that we could move in, along with sneakers. This allowed me to see that, while I wasn't the smallest person there, I wasn't the strongest either.

The career tributes all looked tall and menacing and showed no qualms about intimidating the rest of us.

I'd never handled a weapon before, so I tried my hand at knife-throwing. It wasn't too bad. I managed to hit the target three times out of five, which was reassuring in the face of other tributes who could kill with one glance.

The edible plants station proved to be my favorite one out of all of them. The teacher there was impressed to see how much I knew about them already, considering the fact that I was a city girl. I spent most of my time there, learning to recognize a variety of new plants that I'd never seen before.

I also discovered a knack for first aid, learning how to wrap an excellent bandage and brew quick remedies from various herbs.

"That'll really come in handy. Hopefully the terrain will be what you want it to be," said Hera during the last night before our individual sessions with the Gamemakers.

Acestes nodded, "I remember several times where the terrain for the Games were just fields, or a desert. Some of them were pretty bad arenas."

"Yeah, I remember some of them too," I answered. I'd lived watching the Hunger Games my whole life. My parents had made sure that I'd known everything about them, their unpredictability along with how unfair everything was.

"There was this network of caves once, do you remember?" asked Alex in a low voice.

"With the lizards?" I asked. "Yeah, that was horrible."

Eliana, who was also with us, nodded, "And the arena that was made to look like a bombed-out city. There were barely any plants around."

I shrugged, "Whatever it is, I know that President Snow is going to make it worse than ever. She wants to scare us after what happened last year. I'm pretty sure I won't make it more than a couple of days."

"You don't know that!" said Hera quickly. "I definitely found someone who's interested in sponsoring you, so you should be fine. In fact, if you were to team up with Alex, you'd probably get more sponsors. Acestes did a great job with you two at the parade."

I knew that I didn't want to team up with anybody. I didn't want to have to worry about how many people I would have to betray, and felt it would be better to just be on my own.

_Better not say that to anybody, though, or they'll try to talk you out of it._

The next day found us in our individual sessions quicker than I would have liked. I wasn't expecting much, but I wished I could have been as confident as the career tributes. As it was, I barely stood a chance of getting a score of six, much less anything better.

When my turn arrived, I saw that the Gamemakers were looking at me attentively. I'd done my makeup that morning, causing Hera to exclaim over me, and wondered whether that was the reason they focused on me.

"My name is Nova Raway," I said gently. "From District Six."

I had no idea how long I had, but decided to try knife-throwing first. There was a set of ten throwing knives ready, with stationary holographic targets. Focusing as hard as I could, I was able to hit seven of the ten targets, although only two of them were fatal hits.

_Could have been worse_ , I said to myself before going to the first-aid station. There were "injured" dummies there, sporting various wounds. I spoke as I worked, explaining what I would do for each of the injuries. I made a salve out of various herbs for voracious insect bites and made a very good splint for a sprained ankle. Finally, I demonstrated my technique for bandaging my own right arm, which seemed to impress at least one person.

I moved onto the edible plants station, identifying each of the edible plants and berries there, differentiating them from poisonous ones. I ended up making a salad for myself and taking several bites of it. "Not half bad," I said out loud, causing a few of them to chuckle.

"Thank you for your time, Miss Raway," said Fabius Silverstone, the new Head Gamemaker. I noticed that he looked tense. I certainly couldn't blame him after what had happened to the previous two Head Gamemakers, Seneca Crane and Plutarch Heavensbee.

"Thank you," I said. "I… I hope these Games are everything you'd like them to be."

They looked at me and nodded as I left the room.

"How did it go?" asked Hera. Alex was already waiting for me on our floor.

"Okay, I think. I'm not quite sure what my score is going to be like, but we'll see."

"If it's higher than a five, you'll stand a bit of a chance."

We had to wait until after dinner in order to get our scores. Despite telling everyone that I didn't care what I scored, I was a nervous wreck. I knew I was going to die, that was obvious, but I wanted to have a little luck in the arena before I was killed.

The career tributes, as expected, all got scores between eight and ten. Surprisingly, the boy from District Five, Edward, also scored within that range.

Alex came next, scoring a six. He shrugged it off, saying that it was inevitable, but seemed secretly pleased.

My picture came up on the screen. I took a deep breath and steeled myself for what I knew was going to be a low score.

Seven.

Seven?

"Well-done, Nova!" exclaimed Hera while my entire prep team congratulated me. "That's very good!"

"How did I get a seven? My knife-throwing was mediocre at best."

"Maybe they were impressed by how well you know plants," said Acestes. "I mean, you live in an industrial district. I would have absolutely no idea which plant to eat if I were living out in the woods!"


	3. Chapter 3

"What you need to remember," said Hera, "is that there are potential sponsors in the audience.  _Your_  potential sponsors." She looked directly into my eyes, "So you need to be charming, cute. You have to win them over."

I nodded, not quite sure how to answer that.

"Do you like anybody back home?"

My face grew a little warm, "I… yes. But he doesn't know it."

"He will now. Give him a message. That'll give everyone something to think about."

"But they did the whole lovers thing three years ago. It won't work for me now."

"Oh, I didn't mean it quite like that. But try to work it in, just in case. It might tempt someone into sponsoring you, and that's what we want."

She stood up and looked at me, trying to figure out what to do with me. "At least you're pretty to look at, even with those freckles on your nose. It makes you look innocent."

I said nothing, and after a while, I just went back to my room to have a snack and watch some TV. Of course, every channel was about the Hunger Games. They were airing specials on past Games, the best and worst moments from each. I sat down, watching the Worst Moment Special until it was time for me to go to my prep team for that evening's interviews.

Once again, I found my skin being plucked and rubbed in every imaginable way, although it wasn't as bad as the first time. My hair, which was already wavy to begin with was curled elegantly and left to hang down my back with the sides held up by pretty barrettes.

"Ready for the dress?" asked Acestes.

I nodded in assent. Closing my eyes, I let my team slip the dress onto me, feeling heavy silken material against my skin.

"Wow," I told him. "It's pretty."

The dress was orange with a delicate layer of tulle hanging down from the bottom, giving it an extra inch. Over the corset of the dress were hundreds of rectangular sparkles that accounted for the weight I'd felt, and throwing off darts of light all over the place. They broke off at my waist, turning into a glittering belt, and continued down the dress, forming shiny pleats.

"You look breathtaking," he said.

Alex stared at me when I came to join him and the others. "Look at you," he said quietly, as though he'd never seen me before. "They'll be eating out of the palm of your hand."

I disagreed, especially when I saw that Jade from District One was wearing a gorgeous off-white dress that almost made her look angelic. Had it not been for that creepy gleam in her eyes, I would have been as smitten as the other boys seemed to be.

We all went out onstage, and I felt absolutely overwhelmed at the idea that so many people were watching me. I didn't seem to be the only one. A couple of other girls paled when they saw how big the crowd in front of them was.

The interviews were like all the interviews I'd ever seen before. Every tribute said that he or she was ready to win, mentioning a tidbit bout an aspect of a personal life long gone.

Caesar, however, surprised me when he asked me what my favorite part of the Hunger Games was.

"I'm sorry?" I asked, wanting to make sure I'd heard right.

"You must have a favorite part of the Games. Everyone does."

"I don't really…" my voice faltered. "I have a favorite part of  _one_  of the Games, and I think that everybody here will remember it."

"What's that?" he prompted.

"The moment when Katniss realized she was in love with Peeta," I told him, looking down at the strappy sandals on my feet. "You see, I always wished that I could have a love like that. I'd want that kind of moment in the Games, although I'm very happy he's not here right now."

The crowd sighed and exclaimed at my statement. Hera had been right, they were lapping this up. I saw her beaming at me from her seat in the second row.

"What's his name?" asked Caesar. He looked more excited than I thought necessary.

"Mark." My voice was almost inaudible.

"And what would you tell him if you could see him right now?"

"That I hope to return home someday to tell him how I feel in person." I was certain that it would never happen, and I opened my mouth to say that, but Caesar took my hand and announced that our time was up. Slowly, I went back to my seat to listen to the rest of the interviews.

I'd liked Mark for a couple of years now. He was the type of guy who had classic good looks and was unaware of it. He hadn't known how I'd felt about him – until that moment – and I wondered how he was taking the news.

"That was great, Nova!" exclaimed Hera as we went back to our floor. "I told you that the audience would love it. I've had two more people approach me about you. You stand a good chance now!"

I still doubted that. What kind of a chance did I stand against Jade, or against Bronze, who was also from District One? I hadn't paid very close attention to him, but I'd noticed tonight how strong he was. Thinking back, I remembered that he was very good with a sword.

"Bronze is probably going to win these Games," I said quietly. "And you know it as well as I do, Hera. Anyway, thank you for everything you've done." I hugged her tightly, then moved on to Acestes, who was standing nearby. "I'll see you tomorrow, I guess."

"Yes you will. I'll help you get ready once we get to the Launch Room. I'll come wake you at eight o'clock tomorrow. The Games will begin at ten."

Ten o'clock. That was in less than twelve hours.

I felt panic seeping into my bones, threatening to drive me crazy. I swallowed with difficulty, "I really do hope that you all enjoy watching us die." I hugged my prep team, who looked stunned at my words, then fled to my room. Once alone, I collapsed on my bed and burst into tears.

I wasn't ready to die. I knew I wasn't going to live, but I didn't want to die. I wanted to go home to my parents, to live a normal life. What would I be doing if I weren't waiting to be tossed into the arena? I'd probably be getting ready to figure out what job I would get in the district.

_You'd probably become an interior decorator for the trains or hovercrafts_ , I said to myself.  _You'd paint everything blue._

I loved the color blue. It was so peaceful and serene. I wondered whether I would see a lot of blue when I died…

I wasn't aware of having gone to sleep, but a knock woke me up so suddenly that I jumped off the bed, nearly twisting my ankle. I'd slept in my dress and shoes, not bothering to take them off. The clock above the bed said that it was nearly eight o'clock in the morning.

_Oh my God… is it already time to go?_

I opened the door to see Acestes there.

"Didn't you sleep at all?" he asked, seeing me.

"I fell asleep like this… I must have been tired, or in shock, who knows."

He held up a pair of black sweatpants and a white tee-shirt, "You can take a shower in the launch room if you'd like," he said.

I nodded. Who knew when I would get a chance to wash after today? Then again, what did it matter? If I died during the bloodbath, nobody would care whether I was clean or not. It was bound to be bloody.

I said little as I got dressed and we walked to the elevator, which took us to the roof. A hovercraft was waiting for us, and we climbed on. Three Peacekeepers were there, and one of them took my arm, painfully injecting me with what I knew to be my tracker.

"This will allow the Gamemakers to know how you're doing. In case you start dying, the cameras will be able to focus on you."

"That's nice," I said. I was absolutely terrified.

"You should eat something. Here, we have twenty different options for breakfast."

Breakfast? How could anybody eat, knowing what was about to happen? I watched Acestes choose a fruit salad and coffee, and realized that I was actually ravenous.

"My last meal," I said quietly. "I might as well take advantage of it."

I ordered a ham and cheese omelet with two steaming biscuits and a tall glass of cold milk. Eating slowly, to savor every bite, I looked out the window, seeing Panem below us. Who knew exactly where we were. I noticed settlements, lakes and rivers, and judging by the position of the sun, we were travelling east.

At a quarter to nine, the windows went dark. "We're here," said a Peacekeeper.

My heart beat uncomfortably fast as we landed and were escorted to the launch room that I would be the only person to use. It was impersonal, just a plain metallic room with a white couch and a low table. A wall panel opened and a tray came out with two glasses of water.

"I should go shower." My voice sounded nothing like my normal one.

In the shower, I allowed myself a good cry. This was it. I only had a few hours left to live, if that.

Acestes was waiting for me with my outfit. Khaki green cargo pants with a matching shirt and black military boots that somehow managed not to hurt my feet. The jacket was a darker khaki and obviously waterproof, with a hood.

"Do you have a plan?" he asked me as he brushed out my hair and pulled it into a high ponytail.

"Run. Find water. Try to survive. I think it's a pretty basic plan, one that most tributes will have if they know what's good for them." I sat down and drank off the water in both the glasses.

"I wish you luck, Nova. I know you don't think much of me – of us – but I want you to know that it's been a pleasure getting to know you."

"Thank you, Ace," I told him just as a disembodied voice announced that it was time to go into the tubes. I glanced at the clock, stunned to see that it was very nearly ten. "If you see Hera, please… tell her I'm sorry for what I said to her. None of this is her fault."

He nodded and squeezed my hand as I stepped onto the metal plate. The tube immediately closed in around me, and the plate began to push me up towards a blinding white light.

"Let the 77th Annual Hunger Games begin!" cried the excited voice of Claudius Templesmith.


	4. Chapter 4

We seemed to be in a large bombed-out square. I could see the Cornucopia about twenty yards ahead of me, its mouth angled away from me. I glanced around, taking in the terrain: cracked ground, some rubble directly in front of me that I'd have to jump over in order to try and get any sort of supplies. I spotted a silver backpack halfway between where my pedestal was and the horn, and immediately knew I wanted it.

_Please, God, let me get it…_

My gaze cut to my right, and I saw something that made my blood freeze. It was the sign of the District Six train station, close to where my father worked. Other tributes seemed to be experiencing the same thing: I could see the girl from District seven, who was next to me, staring at something by her feet. It looked like part of a dress. I also saw wrecked cars and storefronts, all of which seemed to be from the separate districts.

 _Intimidation tactic_ , I said to myself.  _They want to terrify us even before we run for the Cornucopia!_

It was working. Immediately, images of my father trapped inside a ruined building flooded over me, threatening to make me scream in terror.

 _Focus!_  I screamed into my own mind.

I looked back towards the gigantic horn. Did I want to try for a weapon? There were spears and swords inside the mouth of the Cornucopia, but I didn't think I'd have a chance against the Career tributes. I decided to only go for the backpack, so that I could have  _something_  before running off.

But running off to  _where_? There didn't seem to be a way out. The area seemed to be surrounded by crumbling walls, without any sort of door. I turned around, immediately spotting a huge and crumbling archway that seemed to lead to an ancient temple. Squinting, I made out trees beyond the archway and noticed a ray of sunshine as well.

_Risky. People could be waiting to ambush me._

But I could only focus on one thing at a time.

The countdown edged closer to ten… nine… eight…seven… six… five… four… three… two… one.

I stopped hearing anything as I began to run as fast as I could towards the silver backpack. I reached it first and immediately grabbed it by the strap, hoisting it onto my shoulder. I was about to turn around to run in the opposite direction, where I saw several other tributes running, when I heard a noise behind me. Instinctively, I raised my arm to protect myself and a girl collided with me, a short silver ax in her hand.

I vaguely recognized her to be a girl from District 4. In my terror, I nearly wet my pants as I fell to the floor, the girl on top of me. She was bigger than me, and stronger, seeming very intent on killing me. I gave a guttural cry, kneeing her very hard in the thigh and using my free hand to claw at her face, leaving two bleeding scratches on her cheek. I bit her hand, hard, and she screamed, momentarily shifting her weight.

That was all I needed. I hit her throat, then used both my hands to try and pry the axe away from her.

It felt as though the struggle lasted hours, but it really must not have been more than a few seconds. She tried to head butt me, but I moved my head so that she hit my shoulder. This brought her completely down on top of me, and I was somehow able to use her momentum to flip us over. I began to hit her hand over and over again, then pressed my left hand against her mouth, pinching her nostrils shut.

I saw her eyes widen in panic when I did that, and she dropped the axe to fight me completely. The moment she did that, I grabbed the weapon and stood up, kicking her hard in the face. I saw blood flowing, but didn't bother to do anything else, simply getting to my feet and staggering away. The taste of coppery fear pervaded my mouth, and I nearly vomited, which would have certainly gotten me killed.

_Run!_

I started to, but I almost felt like my legs had been dipped in molasses. I was already tired, and as I made my way towards what seemed to be the exit, I heard sounds of fighting erupting behind me. A girl was screaming. I kept moving, noticing a tribute tripping over on my right. I paid no attention to him, instead focusing on the archway I'd seen earlier. There was a struggle going on there: two boys were wrestling, clearly terrified.

A low wall, perhaps three feet in height, loomed up in front of me, I went around it, gathering a bit of speed, then noticed that the archway was actually part of a wall that surrounded the courtyard and the Cornucopia. There was a pile of rubble about fifteen feet to the left of the archway, and that's where I went, scrambling up the rubble to reach the top of the wall. As I did this, I glanced back, seeing that the fighting was still going on at the Cornucopia.

From that vantage point, I also saw that the arena stretched out into a dense forest. I didn't distinguish any other features, other than the fact that there was a tree close to the wall that would allow me to climb down from where I was without hurting myself too badly.

I threaded the axe in my belt, securing the handle into the pocket of my pants, then slowly climbed onto the branch that was close to the wall. It wasn't a difficult climb down, and soon, I was on the grassy floor of the forest. I began to run as quickly as I could, wanting to stop and see what was in my pack, but I couldn't afford to stop.

The cannons started firing five minutes later. I counted six blasts, and hoped that it would take the careers a while to regroup and decide to come after those of us who had gotten away.

My fear started ebbing away. I kept moving, walking now instead of running because my lungs were completely on fire. After another minute, I sat down, leaning against a moss-covered tree trunk, and opening my bag.

The first thing I saw inside was a rolled-up sleeping bag, made of a dark grey reflector material. I didn't unroll it, but just touching the material told me that I'd never be cold in the arena, unless the Gamemakers sent us a snowstorm. There was also a switchblade, which I immediately put into my jacket, and two bottles, one full of water, the other one empty.

I allowed myself one small gulp of water, happy to be able to wash away the taste of fear in my mouth, before I put the bottles back in the bag, rummaging through the rest of it. I found nutrition bars, five of them, along with iodine tablets, bandages, matches, a compass, and binoculars. Delving a little more, I found a length of rope and a coil of wire.

But the best part was the axe I had obtained. I took it from where I had secured it and looked at it. It was a throwing axe, I saw that right away, but the handle was comfortable enough for me to use it as a weapon. It was about twelve inches in length, and silver in color. From what I could tell, it was made of stainless steel, so that it wouldn't rust, and was both light and strong.

_I have a weapon!_

The switchblade in my pocket was also a state of the art retractable knife with a three-inch blade that was serrated on one side and razor-sharp on the other. Perfect.

As I repacked everything, I noticed that the bag had a side pocket, and opened it excitedly, finding a large waterproof tarp there that would be ideal for a small shelter or an extra blanket.

I shouldered the pack again, feeling much better about my chances, and began to walk, taking care to keep as hidden as possible. I came to a river ten minutes later, and saw something that made me smile: cattails. Most people would have considered this a weed, but I knew that it was edible, and judging by the way they looked, they were ripe for the picking. I took several of them, folding them and placing them in my bag, and filled my second bottle, just in case, adding a small iodine tablet to it.

The sun was well overhead by the time I stopped again. I had followed the river, keeping it on my left as I walked. I had seen another tribute a few minutes previously, but the girl had been running in the opposite direction, so I wasn't worried. I wondered whether the Careers had taken their supplies away from the Cornucopia yet.

I made a small midday camp, eating two of the cattails and washing them down with a few swigs of river water. The cattails tasted like very green salad and earth, but they weren't all bad. I was happy to have anything to eat at all, remembering several occasions where we had watched tributes starve to death during the Games.

"I'll save my nutrition bars for when I have absolutely nothing at all to eat," I whispered quietly. It was for the best. There was plenty of growth in this lush forest. The cattails were but one example, but I'd seen some clover growing as well. It was the good kind of clover, pure and green, with pink and purple blossoms growing in it. There were probably berries as well, and I was suddenly glad that I'd spent so much time at the edible plants station.

Once my light lunch was over, I put everything back in my bag and started walking again. The sun was starting to get in my eyes, but the trees gave me good cover, so I didn't have to deviate too far from my course.

At around three o'clock, I spotted a large berry bush, whose branches were dipping into the river. The berries on there were a bright pinkish red, and the mere sight of them caused my stomach to awaken. I proceeded with caution. My mother had always told me to be careful with berries because one never knew what one could end up picking. I didn't want to get poisoned.

But as I looked more at the bushes, I smiled. I picked a berry and rolled it around my fingers, breaking it open and smelling it. It was a cranberry. I'd never seen them in the wild before, but there had been an illustration of the bush in the book I'd read on the train. I began to pick them as quickly as I could, actually taking some of the branches and leaves as well. I popped a few of them in my mouth. They were tart to the taste, but not altogether bad. Finally, the only berries left on the bush were the ones hanging in the water. As I reached a hand to pick them too, an orange flash in the water stopped me.

For a second, I saw a fish as big as my hand, with silvery-orange scales swimming around the berries, but it quickly disappeared. Cautiously, I let my hand wander close to where the berries hung in the water, and the fish reappeared, this time with a couple of companions. One of them leapt out of the water, showing me beady eyes and huge teeth.

I had spent a couple of hours studying fish during the training sessions, and thought back to what I had read about river predators. There were freshwater eels, I knew, and water kraits that could have killed in a few minutes. But I hadn't come across those orange fish in any book.

"They have to be dangerous," I said quietly. Since they seemed to attack every time my hand neared the water, I figured there was no other explanation for it, and stepped away from the riverbank.

The sky began to darken a little, signaling the end of the first day. I was having a hard time believing that I had been in the arena for nine hours already and that I was still alive, and that I had a weapon on me.

I stopped walking suddenly and looked at something to my right. A chill came over me so fast I felt like I'd been doused in cold water.

Tombstones were sticking out of the ground, which had turned into dark brown earth. The trees around them weren't full like the luscious growth in the rest of the forest, but instead were skeletal and white, with branches reaching down, as though fingers wanted to caress the graves.

I didn't want to get close to see what was written on the headstones, but a quick count told me that there were twenty-four graves, one for each tribute.

"You unimaginable bastards," I whispered. My mouth felt dry as a bone. I stepped back until I nearly fell into the river. I jumped away, looking down at the water, but there didn't seem to be any of the orange fish anywhere, just tadpoles.

There was an open field behind me. It wasn't very big, and was covered in high undulating grasses. The forest surrounded it on each side.

I didn't want to venture into that field: not knowing what was hiding in the grasses scared me, but I was terrified of staying near the graveyard once night fell. Who knew what the Gamemakers had in store for us there? I wouldn't have put it past them to reanimate the corpses of the six tributes who had fallen so far. The thought made me feel sick. In a few strides, I crossed the river, making sure that no predators were around.

Immediately feeling exposed in the field, I began to walk faster, staying close to the river and scanning the grasses around me. I heard rustling not far to my left and picked up my pace, sprinting towards the tree line.

Something was chasing me, and it wasn't going to let me get to the safety of the forest. I grabbed my axe and turned around, my body nearly going rigid with horror at what I saw.

It was a rat. A snarling beige-colored rat, the size of a pit bull terrier, with wild red eyes and a mouth full of very sharp teeth. Its tail was about three feet long, a naked horrible thing that I had always hated about rats. I swung my axe as it leapt on me, catching its front paw. Blood flew and both of us fell to the ground, the rat squealing in what I felt was more protest than pain. I kicked at it and scooted back, quite scared now, and barely managing to get to my feet.

The rat came for me again and I tried to scream, but only a mewling sound came from my locked throat. Between the rat and the graveyard, I felt I'd have a better chance with the graveyard. I crossed the river again, dipping my axe in the water to wash off the blood just as the rat prepared to pounce on me a second time. This time, it meant to kill me.

I suddenly saw flashes of orange darting towards me and scrambled onto the forest side of the bank in time to avoid the body of the rat, which fell in the water.

It began to shriek in agony. I had to blink twice to make sure my fear wasn't causing me to hallucinate what I was seeing.

The fish were eating it, swarming around it like a pack of bees. A moment later, the rat stopped struggling as blood very quickly began to stain the water red. Fifteen seconds later, there was nothing left of the rat but bones.

I felt my knees weaken and my stomach clenching. Dropping to the ground, I vomited in the river. The fact that the fish swarmed around that too caused me to be sick again. It was some time before I managed to get back to my feet.

For a while, I walked at a glacial pace, feeling as though I was burning with fever. I hoped that I wouldn't encounter any tributes, because I would have been easy prey right then. But nobody came, and as the sun began to dip below the horizon, I entered the forest again, always staying in sight of the river.


	5. Chapter 5

Little by little, the fear left me. I still felt a little jumpy, but it was safer in the forest, or so I thought. I found a thicket of berry bushes – salmonberry this time, judging by the shape of the leaves – and decided that I could stop there for the night. I ate a few of the berries, and even found some nuts that turned out to be excellent, but I didn't really feel like eating anything. However, I did want to know exactly where I was, so I climbed the nearest tree and tried to find the Cornucopia.

The clouds were low as night fell. I hoped it wasn't going to rain, but it was the least of my worries by that time. I couldn't see the Cornucopia, but my eyes followed the river, allowing me to gage the direction it was in. I could still see the rat's field, although it was much further away now. I scanned the area for other tributes, but when I saw none, I dropped back into the bushes.

I still had two cattails in my bag, and ate them slowly, drinking more water. I knew I'd have to replenish both my water bottles tomorrow, because I'd already finished drinking from one of them. But I had no desire to get water from around the same area I'd been sick in and where the rat had been eaten. The idea made me feel nauseated all over again.

_Stop thinking about it, you fool, you're going to be sick again._

Slowly, I unfolded the waterproof tarp and stretched it between the tree and the clump of bushes. The tarp was black, so it wouldn't be visible to anyone, which offered me a minimal amount of protection. Once that was done, I pulled out the sleeping bag, glad to see it had a hood, and slipped inside it, using the backpack as a pillow and keeping a firm hold on my axe.

I woke up about an hour later when the Panem anthem began to play.

One by one, the faces of the six fallen tributes looked down at me. Phyllis from District Five, Spence from District Seven, Cody from District Nine, Kelli from District Ten, and Laurence and Willow from District Eleven. The Fallen.

I had barely interacted with any of the tributes since I'd left home, and yet my eyes stung. When would my face be appearing in the sky? Would anybody cry for me? I wiped the tears from my face, unaware that they'd fallen, and watched as the last face faded into the dark clouds overhead. In the back of my mind, I saw my face up there, and heard my mother wailing in my father's arms. I saw my body mangled on the arena floor, and it merged into various other bodies of tributes who had died over the last seventy-seven years.

The sound of a bird chirping jerked me awake with a small cry. The sky was still dark, but a small band of light was beginning to shine on the horizon. Dawn.

"Wow," I whispered. I rolled away from under the tarp, rubbing my eyes and switching my axe from my right hand to my left. My fingers were completely cramped from having clenched it all night, and it took me a few minutes to be able to flex them properly. My stomach was vehemently protesting my lack of a good dinner and clamored for breakfast.

The bird who had woken me was on the salmonberry bush and was eating its fill of the fruit. As the bush was rather large, nearly taller than me, I moved away from the bird so as not to disturb it, and began picking the fruit as well, popping it into my mouth. The berries were a little sour, but I wasn't about to complain: food was food.

I didn't want to linger, so as soon as I was done eating, I went to the river and quickly washed myself, keeping an eye out for the orange fish. I also replenished my water supply, mentally calculating that I had enough iodine tablets to last me around twenty days, depending on how much I drank.

_Twenty days… I don't want to be here for another twenty days._

The chances of my making it that long were slim at best, but at least I had survived the first night in the arena.

I followed the river that day, keeping myself in the forest. At some point, I spied a thick branch on the floor and hacked at it with my axe until I had a crooked spear, three inches in diameter and reaching up to my hip. I used the switchblade to sharpen the point as much as possible, satisfied with the way it turned out. A Capitol-made spear would kill me in an instant, but this would be useful if I came across another giant rat.

A little before four o'clock, the cannon sounded, making me jump out of my skin. I'd heard no screams, so I hoped that whoever had died was on the other side of the arena. I wondered who it had been. For the first time since I'd entered the arena, I wondered about Alex and how he was doing. I didn't remember seeing him at the Cornucopia, but I'd been so intent on grabbing my bag that I hadn't paid attention to anything else.

Something crashed through the underbrush to my right. My head snapped in that direction, but I saw nothing. I waited a little, and when there was no sign of anybody, I started walking again, keeping my makeshift spear in my right hand and my axe in my belt.

As the second night of the Hunger Games started to fall, so did a light rain. But it wasn't  _good_  rain. One would have expected, that because it was summer, the rain falling would have been warm and pleasant. No. This rain was so cold that my hands were immediately frozen. It seeped through the trees, cooling the temperatures considerably and forcing me to stop walking.

I was tired, having only stopped a few times to use the bathroom and to eat throughout the day. My pack was weighed down by clover, berries, and hazelnuts that I'd found, so I started looking for a place to camp for the night. The rain made it difficult for me to find a comfortable spot, but I finally managed to find an area between two trees that were close to each other. There was underbrush on one side that would hopefully conceal me from anybody coming, although I was fairly hopeful that nobody would be hunting tonight, not while the rain fell.

The area I had picked was relatively dry, but I gathered leaves and branches from the nearby bushes and spread them under the tarp that I'd tied between the two trees. Finally, I sat down, shivering a little, and ate half the clover I had picked that day, along with most of the berries and nuts. I wanted something else, something heartier, but this was the best I could do. I wasn't hungry enough to eat any of my protein bars yet, so I left those alone.

The rain was getting worse. I unrolled my sleeping bag and slid inside, taking my spear with me so that it wouldn't be soaked, and kept my axe in my hand again before pulling the hood tightly against me. I was sure that I resembled some kind of a cocoon and would have found the image funny had I not thought that the Gamemakers were trying to kill at least one of us with the weather.

The cold and downpour persisted through the following day. I kept the tarp around my shoulders as I walked to keep myself as dry as possible, but it didn't help that much. The chill penetrated my very bones, but I had to admit that the wildlife was thriving. I found some delicious loop ferns, whose young sprouts were sweet to the taste. For about thirty minutes, I stayed in that crop of ferns and gorged myself on the greens until I felt completely full.

Once again, I heard something to my right as I ate, but the rain was falling a little thicker now, and I saw nothing more than a shadow. I guessed it was a tribute, but nobody came anywhere near me.

The cannon sounded a little after that, just as lightning streaked the sky.

"I don't like this at all," I whispered. My voice sounded weird to my ears. I decided to stop walking so as to conserve my energy. The ground was now so saturated with water that I hated the idea of camping on the arena floor, so I started searching for a good tree to climb. I'd climbed trees all the time as a child, going to the one small park in our city and pretending to be a monkey while my parents laughed and picnicked below me.

I found a decent tree a few minutes after I'd begun my search and immediately climbed it, scanning its top branches for any predators. I didn't find anything suspicious, and settled on the third branch from the bottom, sheltered by the tarp, which I spread on the branch above me as best I could. From where I was, I had a decent view of the river and the surrounding area. Taking out my binoculars, I scanned the horizon, determining that I would reach the end of the forest by the next day if I kept walking along the river. It seemed to peter out at some point, but I couldn't tell what it turned into.

_Maybe it's the end of the arena._

Further along the river, I saw something that looked like a clearing about half a day away. I resolved to look into that in the morning if the rain calmed down.

That night, I saw that it had been the boy from District Five, Edward, who had died. Julissa from Twelve had died the previous day, which meant that eight tributes had died so far and that sixteen of us were left.

Three days had gone by with eight deaths. If there was one death a day, the Games would last another sixteen days. But I knew from having watched previous Hunger Games that there sometimes were days without deaths, and that if things were too slow, the Gamemakers would shake things up, so to speak. I remember a year where nobody had died for three days, and the arena had suddenly been levelled by an earthquake, killing five tributes at once and leaving the three survivors with little else to do but fight each other.

I hoped that wouldn't happen. Or if it did, I hoped I was no longer there so that I wouldn't have to worry about it.

I tried to stay awake, but I must have fallen asleep in the night, because I woke up once to keep myself from falling out of the tree, and the second time because I heard horrible snarling sounds coming from almost directly beneath me. My blood froze in my veins as I looked down and saw, by the light of the full moon, that there was a creature that looked a little like a hyena, but hideously deformed.

It had a hunched back with tufts of hair that went from behind its eyes and down the spine until it reached the small straight tail. I couldn't see hair on any other parts of its body, but noticed that its eyes were a smoldering red and that its fangs prevented it from completely closing its wide mouth.

_Oh my God, what is that?_

I wanted to scream, to run, but I felt completely paralyzed by fear. Besides, if I made a sound, that thing would probably jump up and get me, or worse, call some friends and simply wait for me to come down. I doubted my makeshift spear would help me against such a creature.

The hyena sat in a pool of moonlight and howled once, twice, sounding exactly the way I'd always imagined a ghoul would sound like. My skin erupted into goose bumps, and I felt the blood draining out of my face when I saw another pair of red eyes stalking over from behind the first hyena. Silent tears began running down my face.

Thinking back to previous Hunger Games, I couldn't remember any creature having looked as terrifying as these. I didn't know what to do. If I moved, even to reach a branch further up, these things would hear me and come after me. It was best for me to stay put, hoping that the sleeping bag was enough to conceal me. Somehow, I found the courage to go back to sleep.

When I jerked awake the following day, the hyenas were gone. My skin felt clammy to the touch, as though I'd run a fever in the night, and I was still very, very scared, but at least the rain had stopped and the clouds in the sky had dispersed.

It took me a full thirty minutes to come down from my tree, and the only reason I did that was because I had to pee so badly that I thought I was going to burst.

_It's okay, Nova… maybe you dreamed it all last night._

But as I was cleaning myself up, I noticed paw prints that went to and from the river.

"Oh man… it wasn't a dream…" I swallowed a fresh wave of fear, stronger than what I had felt at the Cornucopia and started walking away. For now, I wasn't even hungry. I wanted to go home. It was bad enough that I had to worry about tributes killing me, as the careers were apt to do, but now I had to worry about giant rats, and worse, these horrible creatures with the sharpest-looking fangs I'd ever seen.

I barely ate anything that morning. I jumped at shadows, certain that the hyenas were going to come for me and drag me to some terrifying lair in order to eat me. Would people even find my body?

"Stop thinking like that, Nova. You can't fall apart now!"

It was easier said than done. I feared to venture deeper into the forest now, although I supposed that I would have been able to climb trees if bad came to worse. When I heard something stumble, still to my left, I gave a sharp little cry of terror.

With shaking hands, I took the binoculars from my bag and peered into the forest. Someone passed close to a ray of sun that filtered down through the trees.

It was Alex. Was he following me? From the glimpse I saw, he didn't have a bag, but was carrying a branch similar to the one I had, except that he obviously hadn't had anything to cut it with. It also looked as if he hadn't been eating a lot.

"So that's what you're doing, you're following me to see what I'm eating." I was sure that he'd picked berries from my bush a few nights ago, and he'd probably realized that cattails were good to eat as well. I hated the fact that he was following me around, but I wasn't going to do anything about it. I kept moving, feeling a little comforted by the fact that he was so close to me.

After some time, I veered away from the river and ventured to where I had seen the clearing. My heart was beating a little too fast, but my senses were alert. If any hyenas were nearby, I'd recognize their snarling, or so I hoped.

The trees thickened as I walked closer to the area I was searching for. But the next minute, I stopped in my tracks, staring ahead in complete amazement.

It wasn't a clearing at all. Or at least, not a natural one. It was the entrance to what must have been an ancient temple. I had seen pictures of old temples when my class had gone on field trips to the Transportation Museum. One of the paintings had shown an old railway transport stopped in front of a magnificent stone structure with columns and faces depicting old gods.

This seemed very similar, except that the forest had taken over it. Directly to my right was a set of winding stairs that had been overgrown by several large strangling trees, roots visible as they crept down each of the stairs and settled in the earth below. What must have been a big ornamental statue depicted three faces and stood alone in the middle of the room, which was strewn with boulders that, upon closer inspection, were actually statue heads. To my left were square support columns that looked almost intact, except that they'd been overgrown with moss and vines hanging from a thick canopy connecting them both.

"Who would have ever thought that something like this would exist?" I breathed, forgetting for a moment that I was in the Hunger Games arena and that millions of people around Panem were probably watching me.

I started to explore the area in detail, using my spear under bushes to make sure no serpents hid nearby. I found nothing more spectacular than the ruins, except for a lush growth of loop ferns, which I started to snack on because my hunger was returning.

 _This is my place,_  I told myself.  _I will not move from here if I can help it._

I went towards the stairs and began to climb them carefully, testing each step as I went to make sure that it wouldn't crumble under me. They were a little slippery because of the moss, but would make a great place to camp out, thanks to the thick canopy overhead. I'd only have to go to the river every once in a while to replenish my water supply, but since I'd grabbed many berries and some clover, along with more cattails and nuts, I knew I could last at least a couple of days where I was. I hoped the Gamemakers would leave me alone.


	6. Chapter 6

There were no deaths in the arena over the next twenty-four hours. It was highly unusual to have no deaths this early in the Games, and I wondered what was going on with the career tributes. They had probably set up their camp somewhere close to the river to catch any tributes who would be foolhardy enough to venture close to it, but it was probably also close to the Cornucopia.

I was glad that the day was uneventful. It allowed me to explore my sanctuary in a more thorough way. I found some prune-sized fruits hanging from the strangler tree's canopy, and, breaking them open, I noticed that the pulp was dark red and smelled delicious. A cautious taste revealed the sweetest and most delicious thing I'd had since I'd gotten to the arena. Delighted with this discovery, I strengthened my resolve to stay amongst those beautiful ruins.

At the beginning of the fifth day, I noticed that Alex had ventured into the ruins and had fallen asleep between the two support columns, in full view. He looked pale and didn't move when I approached, although I saw his eyes opening. Without a word, I left two fruits next to him, and poured some of my water into a cupped leaf. I wasn't happy with him following me, and part of me was still angry with the way he'd treated me on the train, but he was from my district and I therefore couldn't really let him starve to death. He waited a bit before he ate and drank, but he looked over at me gratefully once he sampled the fruit.

But I had no intention of being his ally. I didn't want any allies simply because I didn't want to be friends with someone only to watch that person die or to have to turn my back.

Alex kept his distance, though. He didn't follow me to the river, which was a good thing because I had the intention of fishing that morning. I wanted something more substantial than fruits and greens, and I was determined to get it. I was afraid that the orange fish would be near, but I didn't see any as I scanned the river bottom for a potential meal.

I had sharpened my spear some more and hoped that it would be sufficient. I stood there, waiting perhaps ten minutes before I saw something worth catching. I hefted my spear in my hand, wishing it were a little heavier, and struck. I didn't expect to catch anything, and was absolutely stunned when I saw that I'd managed to impale a fish that was twice the size of my hand. I had absolutely no idea what kind of fish it was, except that it had silver-blue scales and dark eyes.

Hefting the fish out of the water, I watched it die before bringing it back to the temple ruins. Selecting a spot on the cheek of a statue's head laying on its side, I brought the fish there and cleaned the stone with a dash of water. I picked up my switchblade, and using more instinct than knowledge, I sliced the fish open, trying not to cut the bones.

The inside of the fish showed me guts, something that normally would have made me want to vomit, but now, I splashed some water on there to clean everything out. It wasn't perfect, but I figured it wouldn't matter once I cooked it.

I barely looked up when I heard the cannon fire, as I was focusing now on stripping a small branch of its bark. I washed this as well and stuck it into the fish before making a fire with the bark, some leaves, and some wood. I put everything on the bare ground and used some of the fallen stones in the sanctuary to put around the fire. Ten minutes later, the fire was crackling merrily and I waited a little longer before I started roasting the fish.

I'd never cooked anything that way, and it took me longer than I'd anticipated to get the fish looking the way I thought it should, but was probably because I hadn't waited for the fire to be hot enough.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, I brought the cooked fish back to the statue, where I'd placed several fern leaves held there by rocks to prevent a breeze from knocking them down. I roasted a couple of loop ferns and squeezed some sanctuary fruits on the fish in order to give it more taste. Then, I gingerly took some of the fish's flesh between my fingers and put it in my mouth, chewing slowly.

It wasn't bad at all. In point of fact, the fish, greens, and fruit put together were delicious in a way nothing else could have been to me at that moment. I thought about giving some of the food to Alex, but I was too hungry to do that. Besides, I couldn't see him anywhere.

I felt much better after this large lunch. Nothing more remained of the fish than its skin and the bones, making me wish I'd caught more of the fish. But hopefully, I'd be able to catch others soon.

The food seemed to give me new clarity. Whether this was because of fresh calories or because I'd found myself capable of doing something like catch a fish and cook it in the woods, I didn't know. But I liked this feeling.

I heard Alex coming back sometime around mid-afternoon. I didn't go anywhere near him, but saw that he was carrying a bunch of cattails in his arms. He sat down and ate them with no enthusiasm, looking at the stalks. I wondered why he hadn't taken anything out of the sanctuary. Maybe he wasn't sure what was good to eat and preferred to keep himself safe. Or maybe he thought that the sanctuary was my domain and didn't dare take anything from there.

I'd caught another fish and was busy roasting it, when I heard the sound of leaves crunching underfoot. I froze, my heart beginning to race in my chest. There was something behind me.

 _Something,_  my mind said to me.  _Not someone. And it isn't friendly._

I took the fish from the fire, and grabbed another branch, on which I put some moss that was hanging from nearby trees. Setting that on fire, I waited, peering into the increasing darkness beyond the ruins. I saw the red eyes, and made a split-second decision to toss the fish to the creature. I hated losing my dinner that way, but it was better than being eaten alive by that thing. I heard its jaws snapping closed as it caught the fish, and slight crunching afterwards while it ate.

The hyena didn't come any closer. Perhaps the fire at the end of my branch frightened it enough, I wasn't sure. I didn't move from my spot, not even to turn around. Someone might have come up on me from behind, and I wouldn't have really noticed. As full dark descended on the arena, the hyena left. I could see its skeletal body slinking away from me, pushing itself through the underbrush it had hidden in.

I didn't relax for a while. I wasn't even hungry at that moment because my entire body was tense, waiting for an attack that never came. It took me some time to turn around, and when I did, I saw that Alex was closer to me than he'd ever been since we'd come in here. He looked scared. I didn't know whether he'd seen the hyena, but when I put the branch down and stood up, he seemed to calm down.

We didn't exchange a word. I doused the fire, trying to figure out what I was going to eat now. I thought about the nutrition bars in my bag, but my situation wasn't desperate yet.

Without the fire, the hyenas would probably come back, but I had matches, so I'd be able to start another fire instantly if they came into the sanctuary. I walked up the steps, going as high as I could and gathering moss and dead leaves along the way. By the time I was done, I had a good amount of kindling. I didn't like the idea of having to light a fire in the night – it was too dangerous in the Hunger Games because Career tributes were drawn to it like moths, but I liked the idea of the hyenas even less.

Alex walked up the steps, approaching me with caution. I didn't react, only settling in for the night and looking through my pack for any food I had left in there. I had some loop ferns, along with edible roots I'd dug up near the stream. I'd also stashed berries and nuts in the side pocket of my pack, which was good, if less satisfying than the fish would have been.

I ate slowly, trying to savor every bite, but I still wasn't all that hungry, so I took a handful of what I had and leaned over, giving it to Alex. He looked at me incredulously, but I said nothing. He was obviously very hungry, and ate what I'd given him quickly. A few minutes later, he was asleep.

I jerked awake when Panem's national anthem began to play. One single face was in the sky that night: the girl from District 3.

_Nine tributes gone. Fifteen of us left._

In a way, I wanted the Games to go on forever because it meant that I would live longer. I didn't want any other tributes to die, because if I thought back to all the other games, the number of kids who had been systematically murdered for the Capitol's entertainment was staggering. Suddenly, I wanted to rebel.

 _Murderers!_  I wanted to scream at those who were watching us.  _Butchers! Pigs!_   _Why do we have to pay for what people did decades ago? It's not fair, it's not fair!_

I shook with anger, watching the girl's face fading from the sky. What had her parents felt when they'd seen her killed that afternoon? Had they been numb with shock? I couldn't imagine it. Didn't want to imagine it. I started to cry. I knew Alex was awake and watching me, and that a camera was probably tracked on me, wanting to show a tribute's weakness, but I didn't care. I cried silently, tears pouring down my cheeks without my bothering to wipe them. I fell asleep that way, with my head resting on my knees and my arms curled protectively around my legs.

When I awoke the next morning, I was shivering violently. The Gamemakers had sent a frost during the night it seemed, for I could tell by the light of the rising sun that everything was covered in a thin layer of sparkling stuff. I saw my breath in the air every time I exhaled, and my hands were red with cold.

_Off all the nights to fall asleep outside of my sleeping bag…_

Alex was still asleep, but I could tell that he was freezing. I woke him as I walked by him with as much of the kindling as I could carry. Fire was imperative now.

The sanctuary's courtyard was empty. It didn't look as though anything had come during the night, for I couldn't see any footprints anywhere. I quickly lit the fire and looked for some edible food, but to my dismay, the frost had killed the loop ferns growing nearby, and I was willing to bet that only some cattails had survived this frost.

I hissed in frustration.

Alex appeared, his eyes taking in the dead ferns. He looked at me, his eyes wide, and I shook my head, going back to the fire to warm my hands. He came with me, not speaking and sitting by the fire, looking around wordlessly. Pulling at my spear, I began to sharpen it again, being as it had dulled. Fishing might be my only option, in the hopes that the Gamemakers hadn't frozen the river solid.

Leaving Alex where he was, I slowly made my way to the river, still shivering. The idea of having to go into the water when the outside temperature was only a few degrees above freezing wasn't appealing to me, though I had to admit that starving to death wasn't appealing either.

A thin film of ice covered the river. I used my axe to break the ice, and saw that the water was flowing normally, although it was darker than it had been yesterday. A fish flashed by me, and my reflexes took over, causing me to jab my makeshift spear into the water with such force that I nearly fell in. The spear caught the bottom half of the fish, and I was able to pull it out of the water, needing to use some muscle, because that thing was  _big_ , and thrashing around wildly.

As big as my forearm, the fish was both sleek and wide, seeming to have a lot of flesh. It looked like a salmon, but I'd never seen one live before, so I couldn't be completely sure of what I was seeing. It didn't matter, a fish was food, and I'd even be able to share some of it with Alex.

I went back to the sanctuary after filling my water bottle, finding that Alex was still by the fire. He had obviously been foraging, because he had a few cattails next to him, and was looking at them dubiously. When he saw me coming with the fish, his eyes grew so wide that, for a moment, I thought that a tribute had snuck up behind me. But he was just stunned that I'd managed to catch something as large as that.

It took me longer to clean this fish because of its size, but I at least managed to get most of the bones out before I began to roast it. I put the cattail roots in the fire too, baking them as an appetizer. They were better this way than raw, and both Alex and I ate them with relish while we waited for the fish to finish cooking. When the fish was done, we devoured it, Alex looking surprised that I actually shared my food with him. It was a little bland, but the flesh was nutritious, and that was all I cared about.

The sun was beginning to warm the landscape around us. I saw the frost melting in its rays, and wondered, not for the first time, how the Gamemakers came up with all of this. The time and money it took to conceptualize an arena and to put it in place was huge. I'd have to remember to ask them if I ever got out of there.

The fire died out on its own, and once it did, I picked up my bag. I didn't want to leave the sanctuary, even though it was now a little more barren than it had been when I'd first arrived, but I knew from watching the Games that when tributes stayed in one place too long, something happened to them to ferret them out. It was time to go. I'd always be able to come back.

Alex watched me curiously. I hoped that he didn't think we were friends now just because I'd given him some food. I still had some fish left, so I wrapped it in a couple of leaves and stowed it in the side pocket of my bag. I picked up my spear, realizing that I'd need to make another one soon, and secured my axe to my belt before giving Alex a small wave and beginning to walk away.

I didn't check to see whether he was following me, but it had been his strategy since he'd found me, so I figured he would keep doing it.

For most of the morning, I kept to the river. I hadn't seen or heard any other tributes around me, and wondered where they'd gone to. Was there another source of water in the arena? It was possible, but unlikely. Then again, the river was so long that tributes could have been hiding anywhere. As I ate the rest of my fish for lunch, eating it like a sandwich as a walked, I heard a faint cry coming from somewhere behind me. I wondered whether it was Alex for a moment, but the cry hadn't come from the direction of the Sanctuary.

The cannon sounded ten minutes later, making me wonder who had died, and from what. Ten kids gone now.

At around three o'clock, I noticed that some new cattails were growing along the river, which seemed to be spreading out a little. Scanning the horizon, I stopped walking. The river was petering out into a marsh, and standing where I was, I could see a shipwreck in the mud.

The sight was eerie. It seemed as though the ship were rising from the mud, its rusted carcass covered in water lichen. Mist covered the ground despite the blazing sun that had been shining down on me since I'd left the sanctuary. I could smell the place too, rotten mud that made me think of those horror picture books my father used to read to me on stormy nights to scare me, about swamps and quicksand and creatures made of dirt and slime.

I didn't want to stay there. I didn't even want to keep moving in this swampy land. The only thing I could think of doing was doubling back and going back to my ruins and hope that I'd given enough excitement to the Gamemakers for the day.

I began to turn around when I caught something moving from the corner of my eye.

I didn't want to see what it was, but felt my gaze drawn towards the creature rising from the mud. My breath caught in my throat, cold sweat beginning to trickle down my spine.

A spider. Not one of those small forest spiders that can fit in the palm of your hand, but a massive specimen that was as tall as my knees. It was dark red in color with a lighter hourglass design on its back, with black mud dripping off its body. I'd missed it because it had been concealed in some kind of a hollow behind a fallen log. I could see its pincers dripping with what I knew to be venom, and my mind screamed at me to run.

_No you can't run. If you do, that thing will overtake you._

The spider's legs looked slender, but I had no doubt that it would probably run faster than me. Its venom would kill me in a moment if it bit me.

Trying to ignore the alternate waves of hot and cold that were flashing over my body, I looked straight at it and began to take cautious steps backwards. If I stumbled, I knew that it would be on top of me in less time than it would take me to blink.

The spider sensed the fact that I was leaving. It took several steps towards me and spat. I cried out and flung my arm in front of my face, catching the venom on my hand. Immediately, the skin there began to burn in such a way that I screamed.

The creature jumped with surprising speed. I thrust out my spear, and it went end-first into the spider's open mouth. I gave another cry as it spat again. This time, the venom hit my neck and both my hands. My jacket began to smolder as though acid had hit it, but I couldn't take it off. I kicked at the spider, hard, and stumbled away from it. I fell into a patch of muddy grass, and looked back, convinced that the spider was after me and that it meant to finish me off.

But the spider was lying down in the mud as well, my makeshift spear protruding from its mouth. It was trying to use its legs to dislodge it, but couldn't, and I used that to my advantage, crawling away until I reached the mouth of the river.

I felt nearly blinded by pain, my breath coming in ragged gasps. I tore off my jacket and looked at my hands, seeing that they were much blistered, but that the mud I had crawled through had helped somewhat. My arms had blisters on them as well because the arms of the jacket had corroded away, the acid-like mucus hitting the skin there as well. My neck had fared only a little better, seeing as my jacket had taken most of the spider's venom, but the most tremendous pain was coming from there. I didn't want to know what it looked like.

I stepped into the river, not caring whether the orange fish found me now, and washed myself, clothes and all, to get rid of any residual venom. Once that was done, I gingerly stumbled back to the marsh, looking for the spider. It was gone, but I spied my spear twenty yards away from where I stood. Kneeling, I grabbed a fistful of mud then walked away.

It was blissfully cool when I lathered it on my hands and arms, and on my neck, but it wasn't a cure. I'd need medical attention to recover from this attack, but I wouldn't get it, so I had to make do with what I had.

After what could have been an hour, but was probably mere minutes, I started walking along the river again, hoping to reach the sanctuary sometime before night fell. It was painful for me to walk, but I was grateful about the fact that I  _could_  walk. I didn't want to know what would have happened had the spider actually managed to bite me.

I had no sense of time. My watch had melted due to the spider's venom, so I couldn't figure out what time it was when I finally stopped walking, exhausted. The sun was beginning to dip below the horizon, and from what I could gather, I was still a good way away from the sanctuary. Evidently, the poison  _had_  made its way into my body, because I felt absolutely drained of energy.

I gathered a few loop ferns and tried to eat them, but my stomach rebelled almost immediately. I began to vomit so much that, for a while, I just lay there, shivering violently.

 _I don't want to die,_  I thought.  _Mommy… please help me._

Tears ran down my face as a black and naked fear swept over me. In my fear, I saw everything clearly, the rays of the setting sun, each blade of grass, a white moth unfurling its wings and flying to a tree, and a parachute floating towards me.

_I must be hallucinating._

The parachute landed right next to me, attached to a bag. My hand slowly reached out to touch the parachute, so convinced was I that it was an illusion. It took me a couple of minutes to realize that it was real, and using whatever energy I had left, I sat up and opened the bag's flap.

The first thing I saw there was a first-aid kit, which I immediately picked up. Inside that was a hypodermic needle with a note attached to it, indicating that I should stick myself in the vein that rested in the crook of my left arm.

What did I have to lose at this point?

I poked my arm with the needle, seeing a small amount of blood squirting from the area, and injected myself with what I assumed was the anti-venom. It burned only for a second, after which I felt nothing.

Inside the first-aid kit was also some ointment that I applied to the blistered areas of my body. Part of me wondered how much this had cost my sponsors. I wasn't done being surprised, however. The bag also contained new clothes for me: pants, a shirt, and a new jacket, along with a new watch, and, miracle of miracles, food!

_Food! They sent me food!_

I couldn't believe it: a meat sandwich with a creamy gravy in a delicious loaf of bread, a chocolate bar, and five apples. There was even a bottle of orange juice and a large bottle of pure water! I stared at this treasure trove, unsure as to where I should start.

I was already beginning to feel better as the anti-venom made its way through my system, so I was able to make my way to the river and wash myself slowly, after which I got dressed in the new clothes. I'd never appreciated how good it felt to completely wash oneself and put on something clean. It was a luxury not often afforded anyone in the arena. I hoped it wouldn't be for nothing.

Once I was dressed, I rolled up my soiled clothes, put my pack on my shoulders and carried the sponsor bag and the parachute to a nearby tree, not wanting to stay on the ground, as I remembered it had been a good strategy for Katniss Everdeen three years ago. I settled myself on a forked branch and began to eat my sandwich. It was excellent, and at that moment, seemed like the best thing I'd ever eaten in my life.

I didn't remember falling asleep, but I must have done because I woke up briefly to notice that it had been the boy from District 10 who had died that day.

The spider's venom had made its way through my system more deeply than I had realized, because I slept almost all of the next day and night, waking only to eat an apple and drink some water. I was vaguely surprised that nobody came for me, but I felt so sleepy that I really didn't care. Someone else died, the girl from seven, and I thought it fitting that the victim was from that district, being that it was our seventh day in the arena.

By the following morning, I felt a lot better, except that I really had to pee. I scanned the horizon, then climbed down from my tree, also noting that I was really hungry. I ate my remaining four apples without even thinking about it, along with the chocolate bar, and started to walk. The sky was grey, the sun veiled behind a permanent cloud cover. I usually liked grey weather, but only if I was safe at home with a book to read and a fire warming me. The idea of being stuck in a storm wasn't one I considered fun.

Rain started falling by nine-thirty, and I thought of climbing a tree and hunkering down somewhere, but I hadn't moved enough yet. I didn't want the Gamemakers to focus on me, as I was sure they would be sending something after me if I did.

I reached the sanctuary a few hours later, as the rain increased in intensity. It looked as though the Gamemakers had regrown all of the vegetation around it, because it looked as beautiful and serene as the first time I'd found it. I was glad to be back, and made my way to the stairs where I'd spent the night with Alex. There was a new bush there, and I used my axe to look through it again, checking for creatures. Finally, I sat down behind it, putting my back to the tree growing out of the stairs, and waited.

Sounds of a struggle reached me soon after. Instantly alert, I looked around, scared. A boy burst into the sanctuary's square, bleeding from half a dozen wounds. His face was pale and spattered with mud and gore, and it took me a moment to realize that it was Alex. He was shaking badly and pressing a hand to a wound in his abdomen. He seemed to be forcing himself to breathe. When he turned around, I froze, seeing them at the same time he did.

Three of the Careers, two boys, including Bronze, the boy from District One, who looked too handsome to be allowed, and the girl from district 4.

"No… please, no…" Alex stumbled backwards and fell, holding out his free hand in supplication. "I don't want to die."

There was nothing I could do for him. Even if I'd been able to reach him, my axe wouldn't have done much against the Capitol-made spears and swords the Careers were holding. The three Careers leapt on him and I watched as they killed him, a hand clamped over my mouth to keep from screaming. Tears ran down my face when the cannon sounded, signifying that he had died.

"That was fun," said the girl. "I love it when they beg."

_I should have killed her at the Cornucopia…_

The two boys looked around, "This is a nice place. What do you say we move camp to here? It's about a day away from the Cornucopia if we walk fast. We'd have some pretty good cover."

"That sounds good. But we should get out of here so that they can pick him up," the girl gestured to Alex's body.

To my great relief, they walked away in the opposite direction I was in so that the hovercraft could pick up Alex. From their conversation, I gathered I had at least two days to relax until they came back, but I couldn't be sure about that. I stayed on the alert for a while until Alex as gone, wanting to make sure that they didn't return, but they didn't. I was alone.

Only now did I appreciate how much I'd counted on Alex to be there. Even if our interaction had been minimal in the arena, seeing him following me had given me a sense of companionship. Now, I was really on my own, with nobody to look out for me.

 _He didn't really look out for you when the spider attacked, did he?_  The voice inside me sounded bitter.

_But maybe he wasn't nearby._

Except that I knew this was a lie. I'd seen his shadow in the tree line before I'd crossed over to the swamp. He would have seen the spider attacking me.

_He didn't help me, but he didn't try to steal my stuff either. Anybody else would have taken my bag and my axe, and would have intercepted my parachute._

I waited a while longer to make sure that nobody was coming, then allowed myself to calm down. I felt strangely empty, expecting to see Alex sitting between the two columns as he had before. Instead, the only thing I saw was the pool of blood where he had lain. The rain, which was picking up again, was already watering down the blood, and it made me queasy to look at it. I glanced away.

Lightning streaked the sky once, twice, and thunder rolled, sounding so loud that I could have screamed and nobody would have heard me. It was a full downpour now, and I wondered whether the Gamemakers wanted to flood the arena. I'd seen that happen a few times, and the results had been disastrous for the tributes.

The rain stopped. Not just gradually, but all of a sudden, as though someone had turned off a switch, which, come to think of it, was probably what had happened. The sun came out again, blazing hotter than before, and after the rain, I welcomed it.

I didn't do much for the rest of the day, simply foraging for food and trying to dry the area I'd been in. The same day was much the same, except that I used a rock to try and carve out a rough map of where I'd been in the arena. I didn't doubt that there were more areas away from the river, but I hadn't explored them, nor did I want to.

_But it looks as though the Careers are hunting people along the river. How else would they have found Alex?_

There were no deaths that day, the ninth day of the Hunger Games. Another girl had died after Alex, and I surmised that there were now eleven of us left, with six career tributes. Generally, the Careers hunted down everyone who wasn't them, then started turning on each other. I figured they were going to do the same now. Knowing they were going to come back to the sanctuary, I couldn't stay there, although I hated to leave. I didn't want them to get it. They already had so much, why did I have to give them the only thing in these games that was mine?

_Because they'll kill you if you don't._

I had to leave. But still, as the sun started going down, I remained hesitant to go anywhere. I climbed the tree I'd been leaning on, careful to not move too many leaves, and noticed some smoke coming from not too far away. Obviously, the careers had decided to come over, but wouldn't be there until the following morning.

_Good. I might get lucky._

I dozed throughout the night, waking up every hour to make sure that nobody was coming anywhere near me. I heard nothing approaching, and almost relaxed, managing to sleep for two hours without waking up.

The air was very still the following morning. Ground mist covered everything that I could see, and it was very chilly. The sky had an odd color to it, a yellow that would have belonged to sunrise, except that it was five o'clock in the morning, so it should have still been dark. I got up, gathering my things and putting them all in my large bag.

As quietly as I could, I grabbed a branch and began to make a spear out of it. Something told me I was going to need it. It was thicker than the first one I'd had, and a little heavier, which wouldn't really help me if I had to throw it, but I hoped it would be enough in hand-to-hand combat.

The sun started to rise, but the sky didn't change color. I noticed that although it was a little brighter, there had been nothing to indicate that there  _was_  a sun that day. I realized suddenly that something was going to happen. What it was, I couldn't fathom, but I was already beginning to get scared. I climbed my tree again to check for a fire, but didn't see anything in any direction. My view of the river was uninterrupted, but I saw no tributes in that direction either.

Quickly, I pulled out a nutrition bar from my bag. What was the point in keeping them if I wasn't going to eat them? I ate a full bar, finding that it was a chocolate cereal bar, delicious and definitely filling. I washed it down with the rest of my lemonade, after which I slowly began to climb down the stairs and looking around.

It was eight o'clock. That three hours had already passed since I'd woken up seemed unreal to me. I was so alert that I could almost hear the plants around me breathing.

"This place is creepy! I don't know if I want to stay here," came a voice to my far right. The careers were finally here, so I slowly walked away from them, keeping myself concealed but always keeping sight of the river.

I thought about gathering food for lunch, but I wasn't hungry at all. Besides, I'd just eaten.

_You never know what might happen. What if they send another frost to kill everything so that you can only eat whatever's in your bag?_

The sky was already darkening, and I checked my watch, surprised. Only thirty minutes had elapsed since I'd left the sanctuary, it couldn't be getting dark yet. I checked for clouds, finding none and only seeing that the sky was now a darker yellow, as though a poisonous smoke had been painted over it.

I started digging around for roots and picking berries, seemingly at random, although I was being careful about what I was putting in my bag. I also found some nuts and ferns that I added to my stash, which I wrapped into my parachute, tying it so that nothing would spill. Finally, I went to the river and filled all of my bottles, adding iodine tablets to each of them.

There were no fish in the river. Usually, when I went to get water, or to fish, I'd see minnows or larger fish, even some tadpoles. Now, there was nothing. The water seemed devoid of life. The idea scared me, causing me to look for more food, just in case.

As I was reaching for a clump of berries, I heard a shriek, followed by a more masculine shout. Turning around, I saw something that made my hair stand on end.

It was one of the hyenas, but it was larger and more skeletal than I'd originally thought. Another one came out from behind a tree, then a third one. I heard the sound of something running, and glanced away, which was a mistake. All three hyenas leapt, but I'd already begun to run.

I was happy now that I'd eaten one of the nutrition bars and that I had slept as much as I had. I was rested and my stomach was full, which allowed me to run fast.

I crossed the river at a sprint and kept running, hearing them behind me. Farther down on my right, I could see other people running – the careers. There was no need for me to look back to know that something was chasing them too.

Never having ventured in this part of the arena, I had no idea where I was going or what was waiting for me there.

_Just run!_

The trees were thicker here, and the terrain was mostly flat. I leapt over a fallen log, nearly stumbling but luckily catching myself. I heard something on my right and snapped my eyes that way, seeing one of the giant rats I'd seen earlier in the games.

 _We're being herded_.

I'd seen this happen before, usually with fire, and I could only guess that all of us had been boring the previous day, unless the Gamemakers had already planned it.

I had no idea how long I'd been running. My lungs were burning and my legs were getting tired. I heard screams from somewhere ahead of me, and gathered that we were headed there. I put on a burst of speed, hearing angry snarls behind me, and emerged in a dense clearing, where more ruins stood.

I could only think of a huge stone gazebo supported by large columns –  _colonnades_  – and covered in lichen and creeping plants. Three tributes were already there, none of them with any kind of weapon save a couple of rocks from what I could see. One of the girls was panting hard and could barely stand and was busy holding onto one of the columns to catch her breath.

The careers ran into the clearing and stopped as they saw us. A second later another boy crashed through the trees and skidded to a halt.

_Great, we're all here now, what is it that they want us to do?_

I hoped that they didn't mean for us to kill each other while the mutts surrounded us. It was possible that the Gamemakers wouldn't get rid of the mutts until several of us had died. But most of us were more frightened of the hyenas and the rats than we were of our fellow tributes.

"Are they… gone?" asked the girl from Four. She dropped to her knees, breathing hard.

"Watch out!" I screamed, a reflex on my part.

The girl scrambled to her feet as rats and hyenas began to advance on us, step by step. We had no choice but to group together. Not trusting the careers with something as important as my life, I grouped up with the other tributes, my axe in my right hand and the spear in my left.

The attack started simultaneously. A rat leapt in my direction, and I swung my spear with all my might, managing to bat it away. The boy next to me threw a rock at a hyena, hitting it on the snout. Behind us, we heard snarls and cries, but none of us could spare a glance at the others.

The rat I'd hit leapt on the boy next to me. Before I could even blink, it had sunk its teeth in his neck and the boy screamed once, loudly. I began to hack at the thing with my axe, but it was too late, the boy was dead. The cannon sounded. I didn't even have time to process his death as a hyena suddenly pounced, pinning me to the ground. It was surprisingly heavy and strong, determined to rip out my throat with its curved fangs.

It smelled of death, hot dry fur, and oozing mud. I nearly choked on the stench. My spear arm was trapped by the hyena's paw, but I was able to bury my axe into its side. The muttation gave a scream of fury and pain and lunged for me. I moved away and managed to dislodge my arm and hit the Hyena's face with the stick. It turned towards it, meaning to bite off my hand, which was when I swung my axe again, connecting with the mutt's neck. Blood began to pour from it in streams, and it collapsed on top of me, convulsing.

Wriggling away from under it, I jammed my spear into its side for good measure, then barely had time to raise that same arm to deflect another hyena's attack. It bit my arm and I screamed, feeling its fangs lodge themselves into my flesh. I swung my good arm out of sheer instinct to survive. Again and again, the axe found its mark in the hyena's snout until I buried the blade right between its eyes, instantly killing it.

With difficulty, I pried its jaws open to free my arm, giving a cry when three of its teeth freed themselves from the hyena's mouth and remained in my arm. It was such a gruesome sight that I would have vomited on the spot, except that inhuman screams rose behind me.

Two hyenas had caught the girl from District Two and were busy savaging her.

"Candra!" cried one of the boys.

I didn't entirely know what I was thinking, but I knew that I couldn't let that girl die like that. She would have probably killed me that morning, had she seen me, but I was beyond caring. Not paying attention to the horrible pain in my arm, I threw my spear, unable to believe it when I saw it lodging itself in one of the hyena's hindquarters. The mutt roared, releasing the girl and turning towards me. I advanced towards it, but the cannon told me that the girl had already died.

The next thing I knew, a rat pounced on the creature I'd wounded and started devouring it as it screamed in pain.

I threw up right where I was, not even able to sink to my knees, then looked around, wiping my mouth on my sleeve.

The fighting seemed to be over. Bodies of rats and hyenas littered the area, but the living ones had gone. Maybe the Gamemakers had figured that two deaths were enough for the public. I looked down at my arm, seeing two fangs protruding from the top of the forearm, and another one from the crook of my elbow. Had the hyena hung on much longer, it would have probably ripped it to shreds.

"What do we do now?" asked one of the boys – I think he was from Twelve.

"You die," said Bronze.

I started running before I realized what I was doing, as the boy started to scream.

"Let her go!" cried someone. I didn't know who that comment was directed to, and I frankly didn't care. However, when the cannon sounded for the third time that day, I realized that nobody had followed me.

I didn't stop running, however. I kept going at a modified jog, my rush of adrenalin ebbing away and leaving me feeling a little weak, a fact that wasn't helped by my having vomited up my breakfast earlier. I briefly stopped to grab the smallest bottle of water I had, rinsing out my mouth first, and then drinking deeply. Only afterwards did I begin to move again, munching on one of the loop ferns I'd picked up that morning. As I walked, I gingerly pulled out the fangs from my arm, biting my lip to keep myself from screaming.

One of the fangs was embedded in my bone. When I pulled it out, I saw black spots blooming in front of my eyes, and hoped I wasn't going to faint. That was the very last thing I wanted, so I slapped myself hard with my right hand. The black spots disappeared.

I had no choice but to stop in order to take care of my arm. I took off my jacket, dreading the sight I would see.

In addition to the scars from the spider's venom, I now had large and deep puncture wounds on that arm. The hyena had bitten me hard, and now that I was no longer moving, I felt a fair amount of pain shooting from my elbow down to my fingers.

 _Use some water to clean the wound,_  I said to myself, doing exactly that and using the parachute to wipe the blood away. Bruises were already beginning to form, more severe around my elbow, and I winced when I applied the ointment that had been sent in my first-aid kit. After that, I wrapped my arm with a bandage, securing the white gauze with two pins to keep it in place. Finally, I dumped my food out of the parachute, using that as a sling to keep my arm as immobile as possible.

I didn't know how badly I was injured. I could move my fingers, so I figured that the hyena hadn't completely shattered the bones in my arm, but each step I took brought fresh pain. I had no way to relieve that pain, unless I managed to find the necessary herbs to make a tea. My mother sometimes grew herbs for what she called Pain Tea, a tea that helped with minor aches and pains. At this point, I was willing to try anything.

_You're in a forest. Chances are you're going to find something you can use._

I'd seen something at the herbal station during training that could be of use to me, a bulbous plant that exuded some kind of milk when cut. I'd be able to dilute it in water and drink it to dull the pain, or so I hoped. I'd looked at the plant enough to commit it to memory, but I had no idea how to find it or where it grew.

I walked for about an hour, slowly sipping my water and snacking on some of the things I had in my bag, but I felt absolutely exhausted. All I wanted to do was climb a tree and sleep. But how was I supposed to climb anything if walking was this painful? How could I defend myself if I was attacked?

 _Cross that bridge when you get to it._  My mother said that sometimes, but to think about her was painful in a whole new way. I didn't want to die without seeing her one last time.

I was so intent on not thinking about my mother that I missed the fact that the terrain was changing from dense woods to thinner ones. Wildflowers began to appear, seemingly at random, and just like that, I was in a meadow.

It wasn't a natural meadow, that was impossible, but it was there with flowers and plants like clover and poppies and dandelions.

Poppies.

_That's it!_

I nearly stumbled in my haste to get to the black-hearted pink flower, hurting my arm but not caring. The first few flowers I saw were in full bloom, and therefore wouldn't work for me, but I came across a clump of new poppies that hadn't bloomed yet. They looked exactly like the picture I'd seen at the first-aid station, and I silently thanked every person at the training center as I picked it with shaking hands and pulled out my small bottle of water.

I sat down and took the backpack off my shoulders with difficulty, before taking my switchblade out of the side pocket. With great care, I made a small cut in the bulb, watching as a milky substance oozed out of it. I put the bottle under the cut, making sure that as much milk as possible dropped into the water. With half a bottle of water, I figured I should use the milk from five poppies, which I did.

"I just hope it's not poison," I said to nobody in particular, although it was possible that a camera was on me. "If it is, feel free to laugh at my expense." I shook the bottle to make sure that everything was mixed well, then took a careful sip. The water had a bitter herbal taste to it now, and I waited to see whether I was going to start choking on it. When nothing happened, I took a second sip, then recapped the bottle and put it away.

Whatever it was that I had discovered, it wasn't poison. Five minutes later, I was still feeling the same, so I got to my feet, carefully shouldering my bag again. I began to walk again, but it wasn't until ten minutes afterwards that I realized that the various aches I'd felt throughout my body had lessened. My arm still hurt if I moved it too much, but I found that it was bearable now.

_Still, it would have been best not to get injured._

I hadn't been the only one injured in the fight with the mutts. Although I'd run away quickly, I'd had enough time to notice that everyone had been hurt in some way or another. One of the careers had especially looked in worse shape than those of us who had survived, and I hoped for his sake that he was going to be all right.

Sixteen tributes dead now. Eight of us were left, including five careers.

_I never thought I'd make it to the top eight._

No matter which way this went from this point on, it would be over soon.


	7. Chapter 7

It was raining again, worse than it had since the Hunger Games had started. Huddled under my nylon tarp, I tried to keep myself as dry as possible, but it wasn't easy to do. The rain fell in sheets, and a chilly wind made it impossible for me to get warm.

I was back at the sanctuary, having made my way back there the previous day. I'd had a fairly uneventful time, and the only thing of note that had happened had been that the two careers from District Four had died. The cannons had sounded in quick succession, and I could only guess that the other careers had ambushed them both.

The rain had been falling since I'd woken up that morning. I hadn't really moved, except to get a few fruits and ferns, as the river was still empty of fish. I was glad now to have kept my nutrition bars, because I was going to need them before long.

The cannon sounded, followed almost immediately by a streak of lightning and thunder, making me question what I'd heard. But I figured that rains such as these were making things difficult for all of us. Already, I could see that the river had risen, and I had a feeling that there was going to be flooding if it didn't stop soon.

A gust of wind hit me, colder than anything else so far. I shivered, then sneezed, wondering if I should take more poppy water. It had helped with my arm, as had the ointment I'd rubbed on the puncture wounds, which were now almost fully healed. However, there were bruises running from my elbow to the middle of my forearm. It didn't hurt too badly though, so I decided against it, huddling under both my jackets to try and stay warm.

I was having a rough time of it. I wanted a fire, but it was pointless, and getting into my sleeping bag when I was this wet would just make everything even more uncomfortable. I wished someone would send me a parachute with more waterproof clothes, however, that wasn't going to happen. If I'd indeed heard the cannon, it meant that there were five of us left. None of us would get anything this late in the Games.

The storm continued for the rest of the day, finally letting up by the time night fell. The rain lessened to a drizzle, but the breeze it had carried stayed right where it was, making me feel colder, if that was possible.

I opened my bag, finding that my second shirt had stayed dry, along with my second pair of pants. Quickly, taking care not to hurt my arm any more than I needed to, I stripped off my sopping clothes and put them aside, wringing them out and hoping they would dry in the night. My legs were damp, but I had nothing to dry them with, so I used my hand before putting on my other clothes. I shook out the nylon tarp, securing it a little more to the tree and using rocks to make sure that it stayed in place on the stairs above the one I was sitting on.

Finally, I took out a nutrition bar and ate it slowly. Night had fully fallen by the time I finished it, and the temperature was getting colder and colder. I was sure that the Gamemakers meant for one of us to get very sick, though I didn't think this was entirely fair.

_You're in the Hunger Games. Of course it's not fair. Nothing about this is fair, Nova._

No, nothing about this was fair. We were cold and hungry, and I was sure that all of us would have given a kidney to see our homes again. With most of the tributes dead, I could only imagine the frenzy in our districts now. I wondered what my parents were doing.

I shivered as I unrolled my sleeping bag and slipped inside, my bag at my back for warmth and to make sure it wouldn't get too wet in case the rain started up again. I stayed awake until after the sky displayed the fact that it had been May, the girl from District Eight, who had been killed that day.

_Five left…_

The storm came back during the night, but it wasn't only rain that fell. The temperatures fell so drastically that I saw snowflakes by the light of the full moon. It was enough to freeze everything, and by the time the sun rose again, my nose was completely stuffed up and I had a headache, along with what I knew to be a fever. My arm was hurting more than ever, and I considered drinking all of my poppy water, but I had to save it. If I was careful with it, I'd have enough for another five days, after which I hoped I would be able to get more poppies.

I sat up, shivering violently. I had no desire to leave my sleeping bag, and had I been at home, I would have spent the day in bed sleeping and whimpering for my mother to bring me some hot soup and a hug. But I didn't have that kind of luxury.

 _You could always return to the Cornucopia_ , I thought to myself. The problem was that I had no idea where the careers were. They could have returned there with their supplies, but now that I thought about it, I hadn't found any of their supplies when I'd come back to the sanctuary. I wondered whether they'd lost everything when the mutts had chased us.

Everything was white. It wasn't snow, but I could tell that every surface on which rain had fallen the previous night had frozen. The stairs looked treacherous, and when I tried to fold back my nylon tarp, I found it frozen solid.

 _Oh, hell,_  I said to myself. I took my axe and began to gently tap the material, watching as chips of ice cracked and fell. The sound was as loud as a gunshot, and I winced, afraid that somebody would hear. Ten minutes later, I was able to shake out the tarp and roll it back into my bag before taking two careful sips of poppy water, and eating whatever was left of my ferns and berries. I had three nutrition bars left, and I wanted to keep them until the last possible moment.

Every part of me ached, from the roots of my hair to my back and legs. My arm felt worse, but when I examined it, I saw that the puncture wounds had completely healed, although the bruising remained the same. I grabbed some ice and put it in the parachute, wrapping my arm in it. I shivered more, but hoped that it would help with the swelling.

I spent my entire day in the sanctuary. I looked for ferns and fruits, but there was nothing there anymore. The river was frozen, and even when I managed to break a hole in the ice, I saw that there still weren't any fish there. All I had left were my nutrition bars and maybe a handful of nuts. At least I had plenty of water.

I began to cough sometime in the middle of the afternoon, around the time the cannon went off. My chest hurt when I did, and I stifled the sound as much as I could so that nobody could hear me. With the way I was feeling the careers could have finished me off without much resistance.

Swallowing a bit of water, I grimaced at how raw my throat felt. I couldn't be sick now. There were only four of us left. Only four! I could win this. I didn't know how it was possible, that it was the thirteenth day of the Hunger Games and I was one of the last four people remaining, but I could win.

I had eaten half of a nutrition bar for lunch, and forced myself to keep the rest for later if I could. I was a little hungry, but I had to conserve whatever food I had. I could make my bars last me an extra three days, after which I supposed I would start dying of hunger if the Games weren't over.

That night, as the Panem National Anthem played, I felt the air warming up a little, then suddenly cooling dramatically. My clothes from yesterday were dry, so I was lucky there, despite the fact that I was still shivering violently and that my coughing had gotten a little worse. The face in the sky that evening was the girl from District One.

 _They've turned on each other,_  I thought. That was to be expected at this stage, but that made me feel oddly satisfied. They wouldn't come after me until they'd decimated each other. But that meant that if I were to encounter someone, it would be a fight to the death. I had to get back to the Cornucopia, and resolved to make my way there the following day.

I started doing exactly that as soon as the sun rose. I'd coughed a lot in the night, so I hadn't slept much, and I felt like my fever had gotten worse, so I'd taken an extra dose of poppy water.

The cannon fired a little after eleven, and my heart began to race. Only three. I could do this. If anything, the Hunger Games would be done in three days, if not less. The weather was a little warmer that day, enough so that the ice had melted from the river, which had become a wild torrent. I was afraid of falling in when I replenished my bottle, for a dunking now would surely finish me. My chest hurt a little when I breathed, and the poppy water didn't help that at all, but as long as I could walk, I felt safe. I kept my axe at my belt, barely having the energy to wield it. I thought about grabbing a branch and making it into a spear, but forgot about it after a while.

I reached a clump of bushes hanging in the water, and a distant memory of picking cranberries and being terrified of orange fish came to my mind. The bush was bare now, without leaves, and I still saw no sign of a fish as I ate the rest of my nutrition bar and gobbled up a second one without even thinking about it.

The taste of the chocolate shook me from the stupor I'd been in. The poppy water had helped with the fever, but I felt absolutely drained of energy. Minutes felt like hours, and I barely registered the sound of the second cannon firing that day. As night fell, I found myself at the graveyard I had passed on my first day. I didn't want to stop there, but I felt I didn't have a choice.

Spreading my sleeping bag between two bushes and putting the now-stiff nylon tarp over them to create a shelter, I lay myself down, shivering more than I had before. My fever was back, not helped by the fact that the weather was still cold and rainy.

The anthem began to play, and I watched, seeing that the boy from three and the boy from two had both died.

That meant that only Bronze and I were left in the Hunger Games.

As their faces faded into black, I heard something from the direction of the graveyard. When I looked, I gave a cry that sounded more like a frog's croak, the hairs on the back of my neck stiffening. A smell of decay reached me, and I nearly vomited on the spot as corpses ambled about between the graves. The full moon – it had been a full moon every night so far – cast them into the light, and I saw that it was all the tributes. Alex, May, Nero… everyone who had died was there. They were just walking and moaning softly, and I wanted to run, but I had a feeling that if I even attempted to cross the area, they would come after me.

_Mommy, where are you?_

A mist began to rise from the ground, smelling of death and mud. The smell reminded me of the hyena, and for a second, I became terrified that one of the creatures would come after me, but nothing did. I didn't so much fall asleep as faint from fear.

My vision was blurry when I woke up the following day. I was shivering again, and I could tell that my fever had gotten worse. My chest hurt every time I took a breath, causing me to take a longer time than usual getting to my feet. For breakfast, I took poppy water, gathering that I only had enough for a day, maybe two if I rationed myself.

_Get to the Cornucopia… you have to. Maybe Bronze will die on his own… or maybe you will._

I began to cough, feeling that my throat was horribly raw and painful as I did so, and when I brought my hand to my mouth, it came out streaked with bright red blood. I looked at that blood, terrified, wondering what I'd done to myself.

I was dying.

I had to keep moving. It was more important now than it had been during the bloodbath.

I walked slowly, painstakingly. The aches in my body had lessened a little, and the bit of food I'd eaten was probably helping to keep me moving, but I'd promised myself I wouldn't eat anything else until I reached the Cornucopia. It seemed to take days. I was positive that I'd died and that my own personal hell was that walk back to where it had all begun.

There it was. The ruined archway, the tree that I'd climbed down from, and the wall surrounding the square. The river was nearby, which I hadn't noticed before, and I barely had the presence of mind to fill out one of my empty bottles before stumbling through the archway and into the square.

The careers had obviously cleaned up the area, probably meaning to have it as a home. Even in my state, I could see how this place would have been cozy, even protecting them from the rain, if they had stayed inside the horn. But there was no food here, just empty ruins and inedible weeds. Eventually, someone would have had to venture out, even if they'd had all of their supplies with them.

As I reached the horn, I collapsed, too exhausted to move on. I'd been coughing on and off all day, but now, a proper coughing fit overtook me, leaving me breathless. I stayed on the floor of the horn, noticing a dry blood stain near one of the walls. I guessed that a tribute had died there on the first day. The thought made me sad.

I couldn't seem to fall asleep as night fell. Bronze was still alive, for no cannon had sounded, and I imagined him running over to the horn and killing me where I lay. I drank some poppy water and ate my second to last nutrition bar just as the sky began to lighten. Colors looked strange. Too bright and new. The red of my blood was ethereal, while the sky, steel grey and cold, seemed so close that I could have reached out and touched it.

I ate again, drank the rest of my poppy water – a large dose – and fell asleep curled under my nylon tarp. The dreams I had hovered somewhere between memory and insanity. Alex was a hyena in love with me and screaming at me that he'd never leave me. The Capitol was a spider who had us trapped in its web of games and was laughing at everything we did as it watched us together, eating berries and fish.

When I woke up, I saw someone in the square with me.


	8. Chapter 8

There's this saying in my district that goes like this: "Before you die, you know everything."

I found that to be true in my case. Bronze had found me, and he was here to kill me. I knew I was going to die, and while I didn't want to, I knew it was inevitable. Bronze was bigger than me, stronger than me, and had more fighting experience than I did. He had a spear, while I only had an axe, and I felt too tired to wield it now.

_Well, come on, Bronze. If it's gonna be now, you might as well get it over with._

My mind felt strangely clear. I got to my feet, painstakingly pulling my axe from my belt. It was difficult to stand, so I placed my hand on the mouth of the Cornucopia, coughing wetly. My lungs felt as though they were on fire.

Bronze was walking towards me, but with difficulty. I saw that blood decorated his jacket and even from where I stood, I saw that he was pale, clearly not doing well at all. It occurred to me that he was dying too. He trailed blood when he walked. In the normal world, my first instinct would have been to go to him and help him, give him some of my water and try to take care of him.

But we were in the final stage of the Hunger Games. Everyone in my district and in District One was probably beside themselves by now, wondering who was going to win. The honor given to a winning tribute was said to be amazing. Except that a lot of victors had been killed before these games had begun.

Bronze had almost reached me.

"Hi, Bronze," I said to him. Except that my voice was only a whisper. I could barely hear myself. But he must have read my lips because he smiled a little.

"Hi. You're Nova, right?" He sounded a little stronger than me, but not by much.

I nodded.

"You're pretty. Even now… when I'm about to kill you, I think you're pretty."

Well now.

He threw his spear at me. It was a calculated throw, and I somehow managed to move away from the mouth of the horn without it hitting me. I didn't throw my axe at him. I couldn't. So I tossed it into the horn, where it joined the spear at the back. Then I waited.

Bronze was still coming towards me. "You shouldn't have done that," he said. He collided against me, surprisingly heavy, and we both fell to the ground, on our knees. He was crying, and I found that I was as well, almost choking on pain and fear. I didn't want to die, and I didn't want him to die either. It wasn't fair.

I kissed him. I hadn't kissed anyone like that in a very long time, and I wasn't able to keep it up for long, as my lungs demanded that I try to breathe, but he kissed me back, his arms wrapping themselves around me.

"Nova," he said quietly when we pulled away a second later. I sat down, leaning against the metal wall and he crawled to me until he was sitting next to me, his hand entangled with mine. After a while, he pulled me closer and I snuggled against him, my foggy mind wondering what the hell I was doing. I could have killed him. I could be out of the arena.

But I didn't want to win like that. If I was going to die, I wanted to die like that, in someone's arms. Tears ran down my face.

"Don't cry," he whispered. "We're going to be all right, you'll… you'll see." He shivered. I thought that he probably had a fever, but I sure couldn't feel it, being as I was burning up as well.

"Where are you hurt?" I asked him.

He opened his jacket and my eyes widened. "Nero gave me a little present after he killed Jade in her sleep."

I looked at the wound in horror. No amount of poppy water would help him. He'd need extensive surgery to repair the damage done by the blade that had cut him. I marveled that he had been able to walk to the Cornucopia after such a blow. "He killed Jade in her sleep?" I asked, unable to imagine such a thing.

"I should have seen it coming. After Jacob died from what the hyenas did to him, we killed Callie. You understand, right?" he looked at me imploringly. "We  _had_  to. Callie was also injured, and we'd lost almost all of our supplies when we ran from the hyenas. She couldn't have stayed alive."

The only thing I could do was nod. "I understand." I didn't, really, but he looked so miserable that I didn't have the heart to make him feel bad about it.

"Anyways, he came after me. He didn't cut me the way he wanted to, though, so I hit him hard enough to stun him, then ran away. I have no idea why he died…" he began to cough, blood dribbling down his chin. I wiped it off for him.

"You did good," I whispered, as my own coughing fit took over me. I was at it for a few minutes, and felt him patting my back gently.

"Pneumonia?" he asked me once I was done.

I nodded again. I began to shiver, and opened my bag to take my sleeping bag and cover both myself and Bronze.

"It's too bad we're in the Games together," he whispered. "I think you and I could have been friends if we'd met under different circumstances."

A tear ran down my face and he held me, kissing my forehead gently. I don't know if we dozed off, but we stayed that way for a long time. I knew that the Gamemakers would be bored, watching us, and I hoped that they wouldn't think about sending something after us to finish the Games quickly.

The cannon sounded an hour later, startling me.

I looked at Bronze, "Did we miss someone? Was there someone else alive in the are –." My voice trailed off when I saw that the cannon had sounded for him. His eyes stared unseeingly at the floor of the Cornucopia, a trickle of blood still falling from his lips.

Without warning, I burst into tears. I called out Bronze's name with a sob, willing him to come back, and didn't even hear it when Claudius Templesmith announced me as the winner of the 77th Hunger Games. I stayed against him until someone put a hand on my shoulder. Weak as I was, I shouldn't have thought about fighting, but fight I did. I screamed and kicked as someone wrapped strong arms around me. Or rather, I tried. I felt so weak that it barely registered as a struggle.

The Peacekeeper was gentle with me. "It's all right, Nova, I've got you. It's over, child, it's all over. You've won." He carried me to a waiting ladder, which I recognized as a hovercraft ladder. Seconds later, I was pulled inside the hovercraft and placed on a couch. I couldn't stop crying. I was terrified.

"You're going to be all right, you hear?" Someone was cleaning my arm, and I felt a sharp pain where a needle was inserted, connected to a tube. An IV. "We're going to look after you. This will help you sleep. When you wake up, you'll feel a lot better."

I drifted off into oblivion, plagued by nightmares of rats and hyenas, of spiders eating me alive, and tributes hanging from trees, twitching as their life seeped out of them. I woke up several times, screaming, only to drift off again, medication pulling me downwards again.

One day, I awoke to find Hera sitting in a high-backed chair next to me. Her hair had been colored silvery-blue, and had been put into hundreds of little braids all over her head. I gasped at first when I saw her, then relaxed when she smiled. "Hera?" I asked. I was surprised that my voice worked. I actually felt all right, if a little disoriented.

"Nova. Darling, are you all right?"

"How long have I been out of it?"

"It's been almost a week, my dear. You were very sick. You inadvertently inhaled some mushroom spores when you were in that field getting the poppies. Those gave you a difficult kind of pneumonia that you should have died from. The doctors have had a rough time helping you out, and for a while, they were sure you were going to die. They said that your lungs will be scarred for life, but you're perfectly fine otherwise."

I digested this, "What about Bronze?" I asked.

"Oh, honey. Bronze is dead, you know that." She reached out a hand and brushed a lock of hair away from my forehead, "It's all right."

But it wasn't all right. I couldn't believe he was dead. I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to believe that the Hunger Games had happened, that I was a victor now. I began to cry, and Hera quickly put an arm around me.

"Don't cry, dear. If you do, the doctors will come in here and force me to leave. I don't want you to be alone right now. You've been through a lot. And you have a very big distinction amongst all the other Hunger Games victors."

"What's that?" I asked quietly.

"You didn't kill anybody. You are the first victor in 77 Hunger Games to have never killed anybody. That's big, you know. It's a novelty. And people really like that." She smiled at me

"When I can go home?"

"In a while, my dear. You'll be staying here until tomorrow, then you'll go see Acestes to work on your look for the post-Games interview, which is in five days, on Sunday. We'll take the train on Monday. Oh, if you want anything altered on your body, you should say so. They can't do anything about your lungs, unfortunately, but they've already polished your body so you don't have scars anymore, and they haven't gotten rid of your freckles, although they really wanted to."

"My freckles are a part of me, I don't want them gone," I said. "Did they do something to my voice?" I'd never heard it sounding so clear before.

"They did a minor surgery on your voice box and on both your eyes."

"My eyes?" I looked in the mirror. They were still the same color, but I noticed, now that I focused, that I saw better than I ever had before. "Were they affected by the Games?"

"A little, yes. They thought that it was probably the stress or the fever. In any case, they thought it best to correct the problem before it got too bad. We all want you perfect, after all.

"I won the Games without any alteration." I was speaking quietly. "Oh, thank you so much for the bag. That spider venom would have killed me had you not sent me anything."

"I didn't have much to do with it. I think it came from your district. By the time sponsors were interested in you, a box of crackers cost more than a house in the center of the Capitol would have."

"Well, thank you for trying, at any rate."

A doctor opened the door and walked in, pushing a tray with a small bowl of broth and crackers towards my bed. "Good afternoon, Nova, how are you feeling today? Are you hungry?"

The smell of the broth was delicious and I nodded, "As long as there are no loop ferns or cattails, I'm starving."

The doctor smiled, "A sense of humor, that's a good sign. I know that you probably want more food, but you can't have more than that right now, or you'll be sick."

I ate my broth without complaint along with the crackers, all of which made my stomach churn a little. For dinner, I was allowed toast and applesauce along with orange juice, after which I went back to sleep.

The following day was hectic. I spent most of my time with Acestes as he organized my outfit for the interview. He had even made me a wardrobe that consisted of ten pairs of pants and twenty different shirts and sweaters. I even had several dresses and pajamas to last me until the fall. "I'll send you a lot more clothes later on. My sole job until the next Games will be to make clothes for you."

"Can't I buy my own?" I asked.

"Oh, yes, of course," he replied. "But it's considered good form for a stylist to continue dressing his tribute until the following Hunger Games."

He allowed me to select an outfit for the day, so I chose a pair of lime green sports pants and a matching shirt that I wore with black sneakers with lime green laces. I couldn't think of wearing anything more sophisticated, as I still felt exhausted.

"You don't really like these bright colors, do you?" asked Acestes.

It was true that I wasn't used to how bright and shiny clothes were in the Capitol, "Don't be silly, Ace. They're very nice. I bet this starts a huge trend."

I went back to the first floor and saw that many people were crowded around the entrance, trying to catch a glimpse of me. When they did, they started cheering for me, calling out my name and waving at me. Forcing myself to smile, I waved back at them before taking a walk around the floor. Peacekeepers were stationed everywhere, and they nodded to me as I walked past, following my movements closely.

I found myself in a bar area that I hadn't seen before the Games. Tributes had probably used it, and when the bartender saw me, he stared at me, visibly startled to see me there.

"Nova," he said quietly. "Hello. Can I get you anything to drink?"

"Yes, please," I told him. "Something without spirits."

"Coming right up." He began to pull ice and bottles from underneath the counter, and I watched him as he worked. He was completely bald, but this was a good look for him. His skin was bronze in color and his eyes were startlingly the same shade, seeming to shine in his face as he glanced at me. "You know, I was very impressed by how you won the Games. Many people would have killed their opponent right off."

"I don't think I could have done that," I answered him. "I was feeling so sick, and he was dying anyway…"

He put a drink in front of me in a tall glass. The drink was a clear spring green and seemed to be fizzing. I thanked him and took a sip, my eyes widening. The flavor managed to be sweet and light at the same time. I tasted five different kinds of citrus fruits, the sparkles dancing on my tongue and down my throat.

"This is delicious," I said.

"Thank you, Nova. I'm glad you like it." He smiled at me, "You'd better get back upstairs before people start to wonder where you are."

I nodded, "Do you know if any of the trainers are nearby? I wanted to talk to Gallus from the edible plants station."

"Oh, they're all home now. But you'll be able to talk to them tomorrow if you'd like."

"Thanks." I hid my disappointment as I went back to my room on the sixth floor. Hera was there, and she smiled at me when she saw me.

"There you are. Wow, look at you, you look so casual! It looks good on you. You went to the bar?"

"Yeah, I was hoping to catch the trainers, but they're apparently not here. I wanted to thank them for everything. I mean, Gallus really saved my life with what he taught me."

"Oh, I can have someone contact him for you. Would you like him to have dinner here tonight?"

"Can you do that? It would be great! I mean, I was going to thank him and the others during the interview anyway, but it's impersonal that way."

"Sure I can. I'll take care of that right now. You won't be able to eat much, I'm afraid, because we don't want you to get sick, but we can still have a nice dinner with him."

"Thanks, Hera!" Feeling a little happier, I finished my drink, then went to my room for a nap. It was luxurious to be able to sleep in a bed again. When I thought about it, everything was luxurious now. I'd never appreciated how much I'd taken for granted until I'd been left in the arena to die. Now that I had a second chance, I meant to seize it and run with it.

That evening, I put on a red and white plaid-patterned dress and red flats, and put a flashy white bow in my hair. Gallus looked handsome in white slacks and a blue shirt, and hugged me when he saw me.

"I was happy when I saw that you won, Nova. You showed a lot of know-how in that arena, and you managed not to kill anybody. That's amazing, if I do say so myself."

"I wanted to thank you for everything. I wouldn't have made it out alive if it hadn't been for you." My eyes filled with tears as he kissed me on the forehead. Mere words couldn't express what I felt at that moment, but Gallus seemed to understand. I began to cough suddenly, and had to sit down as my lungs began to burn.

"How come they weren't able to heal her lungs completely?" asked Hera, as an Avox quickly handed me the medicinal spray I was to use every time this happened now.

"Because the spores she inhaled have attached themselves to the walls of her lungs. The only way to remove them would be for them to take out her lungs and scrape off the spores. It's a difficult operation that could have killed her, judging by the state she was in. She's lucky that they were able to heal her as much as they did. The spray they've given her will help with the pain."

I inhaled the spray and looked at him, "Where exactly were the spores? I mean, I didn't see the mushrooms at all."

"They were hidden very well, Nova. You'll see when you do the interview – they'll probably show that to you."

I nodded as we sat down at the table. Acestes and my prep team were also there, exclaiming over the wealth of food spread in front of us. There were three roast chickens with mashed potatoes and gravy, tureens of vegetables in a creamy sauce, what I could only guess was mushroom risotto, which I'd never tasted before, and some kind of stew.

I had a light soup again with tiny glass-like noodles. The taste was delicious, and I gladly ate it, but I would have been happy to eat more, because the time in the arena had reminded me what a precious thing good food was.

"I think that this could be my talent," I said quietly.

"What could it be, my dear?" asked Hera.

"Cooking. I could make some recipes based on what I ate in the arena. The fish that I made with the sanctuary fruit and everything, and cattails with berries. I could write cook books."

"That's a fabulous idea, Nova!" cried Hera. "I don't think that we've had anybody write cook books after the Hunger Games in a long time!"

I smiled a little, already thinking about it. "What kinds of fish  _did_  I catch except for the salmon, do you know?"

"Trout, for the most part," said Acestes. "Did you like it?"

"It was more substantial than cattails and berries, I'll give you that. Still, those saved my life in every way. The roots too."

They began to discuss the Games and what their favorite parts had been. I learned that some hyenas had stolen the career tributes' supplies when they'd run to the colonnades, which had been when their troubles had started. They hadn't even bothered to think about ways to utilize the environment around them to get food and water. While I'd immediately checked every herb to see whether I could get some pain relief, the careers had run around trying to find their way, as was always the case.

I heard that one of the tributes had fallen into the river and had been killed by those orange fish that had terrified me. By the time she had been pulled out, she'd been almost completely eaten. The fish were called piranhas.

"That's…" I couldn't find words to describe the revulsion I felt. I was glad to have already eaten, or I would have ended up not being able to swallow anything. As it was, my stomach rebelled.

"Are you all right?" asked Hera, looking at me.

I shook my head and quickly left the table, going to the bathroom and vomiting as discreetly as I could. My knees shook, and before I knew it, an Avox had come into the bathroom and was cleaning my mouth gently, supporting my weight in her arms. I wondered suddenly what she had done to end up where she was. She held me as I began to cry.

"Nova?" it was Acestes. "Come on out, honey."

It took me some time to compose myself enough to leave the bathroom. I thanked the Avox warmly, squeezing her shoulder before joining the others.

"What's the matter?" asked Hera.

I looked at her, feeling very sad about the fact that neither she nor anybody in the Capitol would ever understand what it was like for those of us who had lived through the Hunger Games. "Oh, nothing. I think that I wasn't ready to eat so much, that's all."

"But all you had was broth."

"I guess it must have been richer than I thought. I'm going to go to bed, guys, I'm really tired." Bidding everyone good night, I went to my room, seeing that the Avox was there waiting for me. She tucked me into bed gently, her hand on my brow feeling like a caress. She couldn't speak, but I knew she was trying to comfort me as much as she could.

When I woke up the next day, I saw that the day was rainy. I'd never thought about it ever raining in the Capitol. It was a place of such fantasy and terror that I'd never really thought about its weather at all. But I should have known that they would do something to make even rain seem mystical. While in the districts, rain, for the most part, was a nuisance that could sometimes back up an entire day of work, here, people just brought out wildly colored umbrellas and crazy-looking ponchos and boots and went about their business.

There were even lights to make the rain look colorful.

I got to my feet, my stomach feeling better than it had the previous evening, although I'd had nightmares on and off all night. I'd managed not to scream, but I'd woken up four times in the middle of the night, convinced that I was going to be killed by the hyenas or that spider.

I didn't want to go on television again. I wanted to be left alone to process everything. But now that I was a victor of the Hunger Games, I belonged to the Capitol. Really, I'd belonged to the capitol ever since my name had been picked out of the thousands of other names that had been floating around the Reaping balls.

I spent the days leading up to the dreaded interview packing my suitcases. I'd been told to take anything I liked from the closet in my room, and I had several giggling hours with Hera as I tried on outfit after outfit, finding that I really liked knee-high boots. I also decided to get a tattoo on my back of a dandelion seed head with one seed left on the stem and twenty-three others scattered across my back, as though taken by the wind, and turning into tiny black birds. It was representative of all the tributes who had been killed in these Games, and Hera nodded in appreciation, stating that the public would go crazy when I showed it off.

Acestes immediately came when he was told about the tattoo and nodded to me, stating that he would rework my dress for the following night so that everyone would be able to see the design. "That's a very clever way of honoring your fellow tributes, Nova," he said admiringly. "Everyone will want a tattoo just like yours, watch."

The day of the interview came. I was eating solid foods again, and was allowed to eat a whole chicken breast with spicy mashed potatoes, vegetables, and a white bean soup.

"You'll be allowed to eat during the viewing of the Games," said Hera as she handed me my inhaler. "Actually, this year, President Snow has decided to make it a restaurant viewing, so everyone will be eating."

I looked at her. I was nauseated enough without having to think of the fact that people would be eating while watching children killing each other.

I went to Acestes and my prep team a little after lunch, to get a massage and to completely get ready again. They left my hair down, curling it a little and applying what I could only describe as hair mascara to give me fire-red highlights. My makeup was dramatic, with my eyes being given a smoky-gray look that made me look fierce.

"Wow, you guys," I said to Gloria, who was my makeup artist, "this is really great."

"Oh, we're happy you like it, Nova," she said, applying some silver-tinted blush to my cheeks and silver-pink lipstick to my lips.

"Now, for the dress," said Acestes. He pulled it over my body, fastening it at my right side, then had me face the mirror.

The dress was of a matte aluminum color, rather like one of those steel soda cans that I had seen in the capitol, but softer than butter to the touch. It had a high open collar that skirted my jaw without being uncomfortable, going down to a neckline that only showed a hint of cleavage. The dress ended an inch above my knees and allowed everyone to see the strappy sandals on my feet, which were beautiful to behold. The exact same color as my dress, they had decorative straps that wound themselves halfway up my calves.

"This is amazing, Ace," I told him. "I love it."

"I thought that our winner had to remind everyone that she's from District Six. You may not have killed anyone in the arena, but your courage and survival skills made everyone love you instantly."

It was time. Slowly, I made my way to where Hera stood, and allowed her to hug me and tell me that I looked beautiful, "just like a winner should". She guided me onto a small platform that began to push me up towards the stage, eerily reminding me of being pushed into the arena.

 _Remember, be confident, and act happy, no matter what you feel,_  I told myself.

I gave a wide smile as everyone began to scream when I appeared onstage in a mist of swirling lights.

"There she is, everyone, the winner of the 77th Hunger Games, miss Nova Raway from District Six!" Caesar Flickerman extended his hand to me and I took it, bowing to him first, then to the crowd, trying to look as happy as possible. "You look beautiful, Nova, look at you! Welcome back!"

"Thank you, Caesar, it's great to be here!" I exclaimed, sounding, to my ears, so excited that I would have rolled my eyes had I been watching myself. "Hi, everyone!" I said, waving at the thousands of people screaming my name. "How are you all doing tonight, Panem?"

"Oh, very good, Nova, very good!" Caesar beamed at me, then had me sit down on a comfortable chair next to him. "So, first things first, how are you? I know everyone was very worried about how sick you got in the arena."

I nodded, "Aw, thank you for worrying, that's sweet of you." I looked out at the crowd and smiled randomly at people, "I'm doing much better, although I was told that my lungs may never fully heal. It's a small price to pay, though. I mean, I get to be here with all of you, and it's a real pleasure, believe me!" The crowd screamed at me, some of the people calling out my name.

Caesar smiled at me, although I caught a hint of sadness in his eyes when I spoke about my lungs. I wasn't the first tribute to come out with a permanent injury due to the Hunger Games. One of the last clear winners, Peeta Mellark from District Twelve, had lost his leg in the 74th Hunger Games. "And how do you feel about that?" he asked me.

"About my lungs? Oh, it's fine. I mean, the Capitol doctors were kind enough to get me this great inhaler that helps me breathe more normally. The medicine inside it actually tastes differently each time I use it. Earlier, it tasted like raspberries, and now…" I took a quick pull of it, "Mmm, spearmint!"

"Very innovative!" said Caesar. "So it's like you have asthma now?"

I gave another nod, wanting to switch the subject, "What did you think of the arena?" I asked him.

"Hey! I'm the one who's supposed to ask the questions!" he exclaimed playfully making everyone laugh. "I really liked it, to be honest. It was a great use of ruined landscapes."

"I'll say. I loved my sanctuary, I thought it was absolutely beautiful."

"Sanctuary?"

"Oh, that's what I called that area. The ruins I was in the most, with the stairs and the columns."

"The temple ruins, you mean, yes, those were great."

"In my opinion, it was one of the best features of any arena that I've ever seen. So, if you don't mind, I'd like to give a round of applause to the designers of the arena, because I felt it was truly inspired."

The crowd roared, getting on its feet and clapping. The Gamemakers, thoroughly stunned because no tribute had ever thanked them before, looked down at them, then at me, smiling a little awkwardly.

"That was a lovely sentiment, Nova, thank you," said Caesar once the cheering had died down a little. "So, the sanctuary, as you call it, was your favorite part of the arena, was it?" he asked. "What was your least favorite part?"

"Oh, without a doubt, the swamp where that ghastly spider was. I may never be able to look at a spider again after this."

"Oh, I agree, that was a horrible creature."

"Although, I have to say that the spider isn't the creature that scared me the most."

"Really? Because we had a census here, and about sixty percent of the people agreed that the spider was the scariest creature in the Games."

"Well, it was terrifying, don't get me wrong, and it would have killed me had someone not been kind enough to send me that parachute. But the hyenas were the things that were the most terrifying to me in the arena."

I heard the crowd murmur, and Caesar nodded in approval. "I'm sure that your experience was a little scarier than ours was being as you actually faced them. Incidentally, what did you think of the fish?"

"The piranhas? Yeah, I had no idea what they were at first, but something told me that they were killers, so I figured it would be best to stay away from them. From what I was told after I got back, it's a good thing I did."

"But you went into the river anyway."

"I had no choice, being as I wanted food. But I always kept an eye out for them when I went fishing. If I didn't see them, I knew it was safe to venture in."

Caesar gave another nod, "I have another question for you, Nova. Why didn't you kill Bronze when you realized that you were the last two people in the Games? I mean, he tried to kill you."

I decided to be as honest as possible, "I couldn't. I mean, I was really sick, for one thing, and I don't think I would have had the necessary strength to kill him. Then there was also the fact that I didn't want to."

"You didn't want to?" Caesar sounded really interested by that. "How do you mean?"

"It's kind of difficult to explain. We were the last two tributes in the arena, I knew he was badly injured and that he was in pain. I wanted to show him compassion before either one of us died. I felt that it would be better for me to die like that, like I wouldn't have anything to be ashamed of."

"Oh, we understand what you mean, Nova," said Caesar. "You hadn't killed anybody in the arena, and you didn't want to start like that, isn't that it?"

"Yes and no," I said, not wanting to contradict him outright. "I wanted to show him, and everyone, I guess, that being chosen for the Hunger Games hadn't turned me into some kind of a savage. I wanted to die in love instead of in hate, and I guess I wanted him to feel that too."

There was silence from the crowd after I said this. I saw many people nodding in agreement. Others were dabbing at their eyes. President Snow was looking almost bored, but the Gamemakers were looking right at me. They believed what I was telling them, which was crucial to me.

Caesar cleared his throat, and when I looked at him, I saw that he seemed emotional. "What a beautiful thing to say," he said quietly. "That brings me to the fact that you are the first victor of the Hunger Games who has managed not to kill anybody. How do you feel about that, Nova?"

"Oh, I don't really know. They told me this when I came out of the arena, that I hadn't killed anyone. I just got lucky that no tribute found me until Bronze did in the end. I mean, I had an axe. I could have killed the girl during the Bloodbath, but I think I was too scared then of what it would mean. That axe saved my life, amongst other things."

"That it did. It must have made you more confident to get your hands on a weapon."

"I couldn't have made it otherwise," I said. "But even with that, I nearly died."

"We're very happy to see that you didn't," said Caesar. "Now, before we watch the highlights of the 77th Hunger Games, we should all have some dinner brought to us!"

Courses began to arrive, and I saw right away that, even by Capitol standards, the food was amazing. I'd never seen so much food in my life, and I noticed that even Caesar looked shocked by the extravagance.

I was served a creamy potato soup just as the lights went out and the replay of the Games began.

It started with the countdown, and I felt a familiar anxiety coming over me. They showed me prominently, which I supposed was completely normal, and I saw how scared I had looked, as though I had been about to wet my pants. But once the countdown ended, I ran immediately. Everyone did, but I was one of the more agile ones. The girl from Four, Callie, got to me, and I saw the struggle, marveling at how I hadn't been killed right there and then. Evidently, I should have been,

It was harrowing. For three hours, I watched myself in the Hunger Games. It was a story of survival, I saw that, and with another camera trailed on me to gage my reaction to what I was seeing, I had to be careful with what I showed.

I managed to eat something during the viewing. Everyone around me, including Caesar ate so much that I thought they were going to be sick, but I ate my soup, roast beef stew with potatoes and carrots, a boiled vegetable casserole served with a heavenly sauce and rice, then finally, some decadent cheesecake. I saw others eating much more than I had, but I was already close to feeling sick, considering what I was watching.

At some point, they showed the part where I had been up in a tree and I had seen the hyena. On film, it was obvious that the creature had seen me as well, but that it had deemed it best not to try and grab me right away. The thought of that creature actively hunting me was harrowing.

Caesar kept up a running commentary throughout the viewing, even asking my opinion on a lot of the things we were seeing, but most of the time, I found myself unable to reply. The memories were too fresh for me, and I feared that they wouldn't go anywhere for a while.

"I have to say," he said while he watched me cooking my large trout, "I was very impressed by the quality of the meals you were able to make for yourself. Most people would have eaten whatever they had in their bags first."

"I've seen too many people making that mistake in past Hunger Games," I told him. "They figure that they'll look for food later because they have sustenance, and afterwards, they notice that there's no food or water around them, which ends up being much worse for them. I didn't want to end up like that."

I don't know how I got through the rest of the viewing. The battle at the colonnades was difficult to see, especially when the Careers started turning on each other. But everyone seemed to love watching it, and, indeed, I knew that the Capitol would release most of the footage from the Games for private purchase. Did people really watch the Games at home with their loved ones, even after they had ended?

I watched myself searching for medicinal plants for my arm, and saw that the spores that had hurt my lungs had been hidden in one of the hollow trees that was in my sanctuary. Had I stayed there continuously, I've no doubt that the spores would have killed me eventually.

 _Leave it to the Gamemakers to give us an area that looks relatively comfortable and booby-trap it with killer fungal spores,_ I thought, not daring to voice my thoughts on the matter. I just tried to keep a smile on my face, and by the time I got back to my room, I felt exhausted, as though I'd physically been through the Games again.

"You're going home tomorrow," said Hera. "But don't you wish you could stay at the Capitol a little longer?"

Not really. I wanted nothing more than to get out of the Capitol as fast as I could, and never come back, if I could manage that. Of course, that wasn't possible. The Victory Tour would be happening in six months' time, and I'd be back so that everyone would be reminded of the Games. And after that, I'd be back in the Capitol every year, to mentor the District Six tributes. I didn't want to think about doing that. It made me feel sick.

I barely slept that night, plagued by more nightmares that caused me to wake up several hours before dawn. I was dressed by five o'clock, having showered and gotten myself something to eat, and when Hera finally showed up, she looked surprised to see me ready to go.

The train ride back home was completely uneventful. Hera, who was coming back with me just for one day, busied herself watching some mindless Capitol program on Hunger Games fashion, while I tried to leave the Games behind me.

But I knew it wasn't possible. The Hunger Games would never truly be behind me. They would always be with me, no matter what. I would always see my fellow tributes in the tattoo on my back and in my dreams. My every waking moment would be spent trying to keep the memories from turning into complete horror.

But I hoped I would be able to manage some version of that.

**The End**


End file.
